Dirty Little Secret/Lando Norris

64. I am going to Bali

The rest of the week was basically the same, I was mostly at home or out with Lola. I did my assignments and I went to classes. I didn't hear a lot from Lando and that was fine, my brother was disappointed that I could not come but he did understand. On Saturday Lola and Madelyn that came back from Italy where she was shooting a scene dragged me out of the house and we went shopping, they each bought me cute baby clothes. Lola bought the cutes teddy bear. We were having lunch and just having fun. "So how is the movie going?" I ask Madelyn and she smiles. "Good, I have to be there again in a weeks' time." I nod and sipped my water. "Tell us how is things going with Lando?" Lola ask and I sigh. "It's not, he went to the doctor with me but that is it, he wants me to move in with him but I can't, we still have a lot to work through." I say and they nod.

We chatted the rest of the time and then Madelyn decided we need to have a girl's night, movies junk food and all. I was thankful to them because I did not want to sit at home alone and to a club I did not have the energy to go to. I was in my PJ's we were in our second movie when my phone rang, I see Lando's name and I walked out. "Hi" "Hey, how are you?" he ask and I can hear music in the background, since when do they party before a race. "I'm good and you?" "Good, I phoned because I don't know if I will have time tomorrow, and I just wanted to let you know that my parents would like to meet you." I frown and sat on my bed. "Okay, but they will have to come here, you know I can't travel that far." "I know, they will, I just don't know when, and I will not be there for my off weeks I am going to Bali, with the Quadrant team" he say and I sigh.

"Its fine Lando, you do not need to report to me, go have fun." I say feeling a bit disappointed he was quiet for a bit and then I hear a female call him. "Okay I need to go, have a nice evening Bella." "Yeah you too" I say and then hang up, he is out enjoying his life and I am stuck at home, I cannot even go visit my parents. I stood up and walk back to the girls. "Everything good." Madelyn ask and I nod. "Was that Lando?" Lola press on and I nod again. "Yeah he is letting me know he will not be here on his two weeks off he is going to Bali." I say and she frown. "What the fuck, I am sorry Bella but that is not right." She say and I just shrug. "It's not like the baby is here and I have to struggle alone, let him go have fun." I say looking at the TV. "It's still not right" she say and I did not say anything, I agree with her, he could have at least came home so that we can try and fix what we have left. On Sunday, I watched the race and Lando go P2. I did not message him to congratulate him because I feel like he is not trying so why do I need to try. The rest of my Sunday was good, I did assignments, and just had a lazy day and then I went to bed.

It was two weeks after that and I felt like my life was the same over and over, my life really stopped because I was pregnant. I heard from Lando here and there, he just asked if I was still good. On Saturday I decided to take my life back and I phoned Mick. "Hey, are you in Monaco?" "Yeah I am why?" "Was wondering if you and Laila want to go out tonight to a club, I am living like an old lady and I need to go out." I say and he laugh. "We would love to." Okay, I am inviting Drew and Odessa and of course Lola and Madelyn" "Sounds good, we will meet you there." I phoned the others and the girls told me they will be at my apartment to get ready with me. We were chatting and having a good time getting ready. "I am so excited to go out, it feels like I wasn't out in a while." I say while doing my makeup. "Yeah, you need to have fun." Lola say and I smile.

We took a taxi to the club, and we met the others, you can see my stomach was a little bit swollen but not that much. I drank water of course and then I went to dance with the girls, I was having a good time, "So how is Lando?" Mick ask as we came to sit down, he already lost his respect for Lando because he knows he is not here supporting me. "Good I guess" I say not really wanting to talk about it. He just nods and did not ask anymore, thank goodness. The rest of the evening was fun, dancing and laughing just what I needed and I missed this going out with my friends. At the end of the night I was so tired, but I still had a good time. I got ready for bed and I lay down scrolling on my phone. Tomorrow is the Spanish GP and I felt sad that I cannot be there, because it is my brother's home race. I see Lando's Instagram and I looked at his face, he looked so happy and it made me sad, he was clearly enjoying his time without me.

I woke up on Sunday and send my brother a message to tell him I will cheer for him and that I am sorry I couldn't be there, I felt off the whole day. I just brushed it off maybe I was tired from yesterday. I was doing assignments sitting on my couch with the TV on, ready to watch the race when I felt a pain in my back, I gasp and sat up a bit. I took a deep breath and then it was gone again. I was 11 weeks already and I will be seeing the doctor in the week. I figured it was just me sitting badly and I moved a little, the race started and I was nervous for my brother, he was not doing well and I felt even worst for not being there for him. The race ended and my brother did badly he ended P6 and him and Charles was fighting a bit, Lando got P2. I messaged my brother to tell him I was still proud of him. I stood up to get myself some tea when I felt a pain in my stomach. "Ahh" I groan folding over and I knew something was not right. I walked to the bathroom to see if there was any blood and there was none. I ran myself a bath and I decided to relax in the bath, maybe the pains will stop.

I did not get anymore pains and I was lying in the bath for a while, I got out and dressed in some leggings and a t shirt and then went to lay on my bed, feeling tired all of a sudden. I heard my phone ringing and I just ignored it, I was really not feeling well. I must have fallen asleep because I woke up with the worst pain I ever felt, I stood up and there was blood, I knew what was happening and I just remain calm, I walked to the bathroom and called a taxi. I got my things and my phone and I walked down to get the taxi, it was 4 in the morning and the streets was quite, I drove to the hospital, and the tears was streaming down my face.

Trigger Warning

There will be mentioning of Miscarriage in the next chapter, please skip if you are uncomfortable with it.