chapter 17: didn't mean it

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"real sweet, but i wish you were sober"

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"real sweet, but i wish you were sober"

-wish you were sober by conan gray


⎯⎯⎯

Kai slams the door on his way out, leaving an uncomfortable silence in his wake. 

I let out a sigh, trying to shake off the unease his mood always brings. 

He didn't say where he was going, but I know he needs space. I just hope he'll be okay.

You should've stopped him.

I'm sorry.

I grab the book I've been reading off my nightstand and curl up on the couch. 

The story pulls me in quickly, and for a while, I forget about the worry with everything and school.

After a couple of chapters, I glance around our dorm. The place is a disaster zone. 

Kai's clothes are scattered everywhere, the sink is overflowing with dirty dishes, and a thin layer of dust covers the shelves.

 I close my book with a decisive thud and a sigh.

Starting with the dishes, I fill the sink with hot, soapy water and plunge my hands in. The repetitive motion of scrubbing and rinsing is oddly therapeutic. 

As I work, I let my mind wander, thinking about everything and nothing at the same time.

With the kitchen clean, I tackle the living room next. 

I hate cleaning.

I pick up Kai's clothes, fold them neatly, and put them away. I vacuum the floor, dust the shelves, and even wipe down the coffee table. By the time I'm done, the room looks almost unrecognizable.

Just as I'm finishing up, my phone rings. I check the caller ID and smile.

"Paytonnnnn!" I greet her, happy to hear her voice.

"Lei!!" she asks, her tone bright and cheerful. "How are youu?"

"I'm good," I lie, not wanting to worry her. "Just cleaning up the dorm. What's up with you?"

"Not much, want the teaa?"

"Yes!!" I exclaim.

We chat for a while, catching up on her latest gossip and problems.

She's very chatty and seems to have a lot of friends and fit in.

I can't relate over here.

By the time we hang up, the dorm is spotless, and I feel a sense of accomplishment. 

I should call her and clean more often!

I grab a snack from the fridge and settle back on the couch with my book, eager to get lost in the story again. 

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