Surrenders of a Damsel

Chapter 24

Lagi siyang maganda sa paningin ko. A living art, a breathing painting, a marvelous creature. There are many ways and proofs I can provide to everyone explaining kung gaano kaganda ang isang nilalang na katulad ni Denzel. If he's a canvas, I would not paint on it. The canvas itself is the art already. If he's a sea, I would not want to swim in it, I would rather watch it from afar and just admire its waves. If he's a pencil, it would be the most expensive, unique, and high-quality piece of pencil. Kung ulap siya, siya na ang pinaamagandang ulap kung ganoon.

He laughs sexily, like a bad boy type but believe me, he's a baby. A baby that you would want to take care of. A baby that brings you joy and laughter, a baby that makes you a baby as well if you get what I mean.

He's the type of man who knows what he wants, and when he does, he will get it no matter what happens. Kaya nga kuhang kuha niya ako eh. I won't deny that, Denzel Kian Hendrix really pulled me into his arms. Siya yung tipong mapagmahal ng sobra, laging abot langit ang ngiti, laging masaya, lagi kang panatag kapag siya na ang iyong kasama. He's rich, he grew up in a rich world, that is why I have always thought that he was out of my league kasi sobrang taas niya, hindi ko siya abot.

Pero siya itong bumaba para lang mapantayan niya ako. Siya itong imbes na patuloy na angatin ang sarili, pinili niyang bagalan ang pag angat para makahabol ako, at para masabayan niya ako. At dahil roon, namalayan ko na lang na minamahal ko na rin pala siya. And that was one of the best decisions I have ever made.

He's a loving man, a caring man, a safe person to lean on. He's honest, speaks smoothly, makes my heart beat so fast, makes my heart flutter, makes me want to just look at him all day and I'll be satisfied already. Isang silay lang ng ngiti niya ay buo na ang araw ko.

But the love we had been sharing needed to come to an end. Kasi hindi ako gusto ng daddy niya. Hindi ko alam kung bakit, pero sinubukan ko na lang intindihin ang daddy ni Denzel, kasi halata naman kung bakit gusto niya akong layuan ko ang anak niya. Kasi hindi ko kapantay ang mundo nila. I'm poor, I'm nobody, I have nothing. And instead of trying to question that, I understood it. And I do not like to force myself into the world where I have to change myself. The world should understand me as well.

I got hurt, it was very painful. Sinubukan kong lumaban pabalik, kahit ang sandata na meron lang ako ay ang pagmamahal ko kay Denzel at ang tiwala na mahal din niya ako kaya sinubukan kong ipaglaban. Kasi buntis na rin ako, may anak akong dinadala at nung mga oras na iyon ay alam ko na kapag sasabihin ko kay Denzel ang lahat ay malaki ang pag asa ko na ipaglalaban niya ako at pananagutan.

Pero tama rin naman si Kiko. Hindi umaayon saakin ang mundo, baka nga papahiyain ako muli ng tatay ni Denzel, at wala pa akong masyadong kayang ipakita. And Denzel's still studying, he has a life ahead of him, at hindi ako ganoon ka-selfish para itali siya saakin kahit kaya kong ako ang magpaaral sakanya. Kahit handa akong angkinin ng buo si Denzel, sinuko ko kasi hindi dapat ganon.

So I chose to leave the man I love kahit hindi ko kaya. I chose to leave and start a new life without him. Pinalaki ko ng mag isa ang anak ko, kasama si Kiko at Val, kasama si Auntie Juliana kahit sandali niya lang nakasama ang apo niya saakin. Sinubukan kong bumangon muli, sinubukan kong magtyaga muli kasi may panibagong bagay na akong hinaharap ngayon.

May papatunayan na ako ngayon, may kaya na akong ipaglaban, may kaya na akong panama pabalik kung sakali. I'm ready now to go back to the Philippines and try to achieve my main goal. Fighting Denzel back.

Tapos na ako sa ibang goals ko, natapos ko na ang mga ibang plano, nakaluwag luwag na ako at alam kong kaya ko na, may ibang bahagi ng loob ko na kinakabahan ako at hindi pa ako handa, pero meron naman sa ibang bahagi na kayang kaya ko na at handang handa na ako. We are going back to the Philippines, I will meet with Denzel, talk to him thoroughly, and tell him everything. Kailangan nilang magkita ni Maddy. Ng anak niya.