Chapter 43

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" Little do you know,
How I'm breaking,
while you fall asleep,
Little do you know,
I'm still haunted by the memory,
Little do you know I try to pick myself piece by piece,
Little do you know I,
Need a little more time" Alex & Sierra- Little Do You Know..

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Rawan's POV:


I checked all of my bags, making sure that I don't forget anything that belongs to me considering that I won't and can't be back to Harry's again. I will leave, that's the best for me, for Zayn and for everyone else. It's my decision anyway and I make sure that no one know that I will leave and travel, not even Harry or Sarah. They shouldn't know because I know too well that they will try to stop me by using Adam's and Zayn's cards.


I take a paper from my notebook and start writing a letter, writing things that I will never be able to say it out loud in front of anyone, but I think it will be the best if I expose my feelings to my best friends, and maybe my husband.


" Dear my best people in my life,
I don't know what should I say but I think it will be the best if I keep it that way. I really want to apologize for everything that I made to everyone of you, that's why I decided to stop it for the best.


I decided to leave all of this mess, I am tired, I swear I try to clean all of this up but can't when I feel all alone, I know all of you are with me, but I can't shake the feeling that I feel every time when I see you with your boyfriend /girlfriend and I am single like a lost puppy! I am not jealous, seriously I am so happy because you have a perfect life when the one you love! Don't worry, I am not gonna commit suicide, although I wish I could die today before tomorrow! I will leave, for good, I just want to be far away from all of this mess and try to think clearly and alone to try to make the right decision for me and my life.


Sarah, you are the best friend that anyone could ask for, you are my soulmate that can understand me so easily without even trying asking me to explain, seriously, I thank God that I have you in my life as my more than best friend, I even think if I had had a sister, I would 
never love her like I do. And I wish you all the best in your life with your boyfriend, Harry, and your baby. Don't be sad because I left, but I promise you, as soon as I find my real self again, I will call you. That's a promise. Don't tire yourself and take a good care of yourself and your baby, and don't miss me much, Aha! Xx


Harry, oh! What am I gonna say about the best brother? You are the best brother that anyone can ask for, you are the first one who knows how to help me during my hard days, you are my backbone and everything good in my life, and trust me, I can't ask for more a better brother! Please, Don't be mad at me for leaving, I swear I couldn't tell you because I know too well that you would say things to make me stay, and I want to be far away, I want to be alone. I am so sorry but I had to do it! Please, take care of Sarah and your baby, and don't let Sarah be sad or angry, although I know you are a good keeper.


Niall, my little leprechaun! You are the best, I swear! You are my role model in taking my life so easily and be optimistic with everything I do! You make me feel alive with your happy voice, and I know too well that you deserve the best thing in your life. And trust me, the people who send you hate are the most stupid people alive! Don't ever think that low of yourself and keep 
smile with your cutie teeth, Aha!


Emily, my second sister! If there was more than 'I love you' , I would tell it to you. You are the best sister, trust me! Always think that you are not alone, don't make my mistake, please! Make yourself happy and take care of Niall, he loves you so much by the way.

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