Josephine Swan never imagined that her stay in South Korea would lead her into K-Pop's glittering and challenging world. Each day, she encounters new hurdles and adventures that fate has in store for her and her four team members. Between gruelling...
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The long white sleeves of my cropped jumper slid over the shiny surface of the wooden table while my grey eyes focused almost every second on the long corridor of the first floor. They followed the figures, consisting of men and women of all ages and positions, whose brisk movements interrupted the reflective lights of the polished, bright floor of the cafeteria with their elongated shadows and caused a definite disturbance within the ample space.
The smell of freshly prepared vegetables and meat, combined with worn leather and used trainers, penetrated the two rounded openings of my nose and mingled with the aromas of natural body odours, expensive and cheap perfumes, scented water, and the various deodorants of the people entering and already eating in our immediate vicinity.
"Can you recognise them, Josie?" Jennie asked me, brown eyes twinkling with concern, bending to meet my movements as soon as another large crowd of employees entered the YG Entertainment cafeteria, crowded through the narrow dark corridor and began to divide amongst themselves. I could feel the growing cold on the left side of my thigh, which spread through the thin black fabric of my leggings onto my still-damp skin with every further tilt of my upper body and the resulting slipping movement.
The other three remaining members of our group fell silent in their superficial conversation and also turned towards the open entrance. The passage had been taken over by the accumulated number of hungry people and generally prevented a clear view of the lift and the corridor.
Resignedly silent, I just shook my head and moved back to Jennie's side, allowing the delicate notes of jasmine and vanilla from her recently applied perfume to momentarily silence the unpleasant food and strong odours in my head and instead leave behind an invitingly pleasant floral scent combination.
"It's already been half an hour," our oldest member anxiously murmured. The long nails of her fluttering fingers rattled restlessly on the smooth screen of her phone, continuously flashing the large white numbers on her digital watch.
"That's usually a good sign... isn't it?" Lisa began to ask us cautiously and then lowered her head in concern.
"I don't know...given that he wanted to speak to her privately immediately after our performance and the reviews we received," Rosé said quietly, her teeth drawing in most of her lower lip, inferring her palpitating nervousness. Her dark eyes suddenly turned towards the entrance to the canteen, her upper body erect, before she slumped slightly again with the failure to recognise and emerge the person she wanted and turned her attention back to our conversation.
"Do you think..." Jennie added haltingly to the native New Zealander, and I saw her swallow hard as her unspoken hints hung over our heads with tension, dangerously oppressive and almost frightening in the face of the possible impending reality of losing a member of our group. I could see how the girls' expressions seemed to sink even deeper into themselves, and I shook my head quickly.
"Time and length can be a significant factor within a conversation, but...I don't think it's significant in terms of content. At the moment, I don't think we should assume too much and interpret too much. Even if it is a clear and perceived mental challenge, the best thing to do now is... stay positive and banish any negative thoughts." I immediately interrupted Jennie with a pleasingly dissenting voice and grasped her petite hand with a small sigh, silently returning my handshake.
"I found a beautiful and appropriate quote for my exam preparations the other day. The writer said you can't think negatively and expect positive things simultaneously." I quickly gave in with a mollified smile on my part.
Of course, it wasn't always easy to think positively and maintain a contemplative attitude.
In many ways, it was a great challenge to our consciousness, self-reflection skills, and inner strength, which were essential to survive not only in our training as K-Pop idols but also in hard-similar career paths such as politics, business, law, modelling, or acting.
Many professions subordinate to these categories appealed to an inestimable number of striving and ambitious people worldwide who wanted to turn their childhood dreams and imaginings into a reality and set their sights on successful advancement.
It was wishful thinking, akin to naivety, to achieve a desired productive career without negative events, stresses, setbacks, and doubts.
The five girls in my group alone were selected from several hundred applicants and candidates for YG Entertainment. They were trained for years, following monthly selection processes and ever-increasing obstacles, including moving to a foreign country, losing physical contact with their own family, and learning a new language. Added to this was the psychological pressure and mental strain that built up over time, and the ever-increasing competition threatened to engulf them.
Developing and building inner resilience that pulls you through the day-to-day and, most likely, years-long challenges and tasks until the appropriate reward, such as a debut, a leading role, or even the attainment of a high hierarchical position, is within reach.
Climbing the career ladder required a high degree of discipline and endeavour in many areas. One must also have the ambition to expand one's initially outstanding skills and to learn and responsibly apply new experiences and knowledge.
Not to let the light that emanates from you go out.
And to succeed despite the other seemingly unlimited possibilities and diverse paths.
"I'm sure it's all right," I said, my voice seemingly drowned out by the flow of my thoughts. I could feel my fingers twitching nervously, slowly stroking Jennie's thin skin as the superficial coldness of her skin penetrated my palms and confronted my sweaty warmth.
"She's coming." I heard Jennie say, and her fingers tightened in mine as soon as the chin-length black hair of the familiar Korean woman finally flashed beneath the sea of accumulated people. And with each closer step she took, the tips of Jennie's nails sank deeper into my skin.
