Requested by: @reputation_dress
The atmosphere at the VMAs was a whirlwind of flashing lights, excited chatter, and high fashion. Taylor was used to this kind of setting; she'd been here countless times before, her smile wide and camera-ready, her presence commanding attention. But tonight, something was different.
She sat in her seat, the faint hum of conversations and laughter around her as she tried to focus on anything but the pounding in her chest. The VMAs were always intense, but when her publicist had mentioned a special "Taylor Camera" earlier that day, everything had shifted.
"It'll just focus on you from time to time throughout the night," her publicist had said. "The fans love your reactions."
Taylor had nodded back then, brushing it off as a non-issue. After all, she was used to being on camera. But now, sitting in the audience, the reality of it sank in deeper. A camera. On her. All night.
She could already feel it—the constant gaze, capturing every expression, every moment of nervousness, every shift in her seat. The idea of it gnawed at her insides, making her feel trapped. Her smile felt forced, her laugh hollow, as she waved to friends and familiar faces.
Beside her, Travis looked completely at ease, relaxed in his seat with one arm draped casually around her. He leaned in and whispered something about the opening act, trying to make her laugh, but she barely heard him.
Her mind was spiraling.
*What if I mess up? What if I say something wrong? What if they catch me looking awkward? What if I look anxious?* The thoughts were coming too fast now, tumbling over one another until she couldn't breathe.
Her chest tightened, her throat constricting as her hands clenched into fists in her lap. She tried to control her breathing, but it was no use. The panic was building. She could feel her heartbeat thundering in her ears, drowning out everything else. *Not here. Not now.*
"I... I need to go to the bathroom," she mumbled quickly to Travis, standing up before he could even respond.
"Taylor?" he called after her, concern immediately flooding his voice as she hurried away, barely able to keep herself together.
She rushed down the dimly lit hallway, her heels clicking loudly against the polished floor, her hands shaking uncontrollably. Her stomach churned violently, and by the time she reached the bathroom, she was gasping for breath. Pushing open the door, she barely made it to the nearest stall before the contents of her stomach came rushing up.
Her body shook as she collapsed to her knees, gripping the edge of the toilet as she retched. Tears blurred her vision, the room spinning as her mind raced with panic. The thought of that camera — capturing her every reaction, every forced smile — it was too much. It was suffocating.
Her heart raced as her breath came in shallow gasps. She was still on the floor, her body trembling, when the bathroom door creaked open behind her.
"Taylor?" Travis's voice echoed softly in the tiled room, his heavy footsteps quickening as he found her kneeling in the stall. He rushed to her side, kneeling down beside her without hesitation. "Hey, hey... I'm here. You're okay."
She looked up at him, tears streaming down her cheeks. "I-I can't... I can't do it," she stammered, her voice shaking as she tried to catch her breath. "That camera's going to be on me all night, Travis. I can't... I feel like I'm going to fall apart."
Travis gently helped her up from the floor, pulling her into his arms. His hand rubbed soothing circles on her back, his voice calm and steady. "Shh, it's okay, babe. You don't have to do anything you don't want to. We can leave, okay? We don't have to stay."
