Heaven and back

Wrong timing

Shane's pov

*Flashback*

"Are you seriously going to leave everything unfinished just because of one small mistake??" My mother asked furious and hurt as well. I could bot bear to look at her in the eyes. I turned around and pinched my nose trying to calm down. "Do you think it's easy for me to make this decision? Does it look like i have a choice? How can i help him if he's so cut deep? Who am i to be able to handle this shit?" I asked still looking to the door. I wanted to leave. This wasn't the first time nor will be the last that my brother was in trouble and I knew it. She did too. She just didn't want to admit the fact that her son was a lost cause. "You should never talk about him like that" she said lowly now looking at the floor . Realisation hit her. About time. "It's the truth and you know it. He's a junkie. I have done everything in my power to help him. But he doesn't want it" i said now bringing my eyes up to hers. Tears streamed down her face making me even more angry. She knew this was going to happen. It was her fault for not taking him seriously. She always argued with him. Making his life a literal hell. That's why he got involved in this shit in the first place. "It is your fault. And what's worse is that you know it and you don't do anything about it. You always wait for me to but in and save him. But now i fear it's too late mother" i said and before she could reply i left slamming the door behind me.

*End of flashback*

I sighed looking out the window of the bus. That was the last time i spoke to her. I put my brother to rehab. He got better. He wasn't anymore the same alcoholic junkie i once knew. Until my father busted in his personal life and fucked everything up. That's why i was headed to the hospital. Justin drunk a non alcoholic drink which my father had spiked for "fun". And now here we are. I walked up to the office of the lady in the reception and put on a weak smile "Hello I'm here for Justin brocker?" I asked and the woman looked at me before throwing me a soft smile and looking at her computer. "He's at twenty two G. Its on the fourth floor" she said with a sympathetic smile and i nodded thanking her. I basically run up the stairs and when i got to the floor i was supposed to be i saw both of my parents outside his room. My dad looked as if nothing was wrong. How can he even exist after something like this? My mother though knew what he had done was unforgivable. I could see it in ber eyes. Once my father saw i was there his eyes widened. A huge sudden feeling of guilt took over his face. I quickly stepped towards him and pinned him to the wall "ARE YOU FUCKING NUTS? WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS? TO YOUR SON?" I shouted at his face. Horror was written allover his face. "Honey please" my mother tried but in no avail "You stay out of this. For once this doesn't concern you" i said before returning to my father. He remained silent. He didn't have anything to say for himself. "You did an evil thing" i said before leaving him. He stood there trying to breathe but i just couldn't stand seeing him anymore so i punched him before going towards Justin's room "honey wait" my mother tried again. "No. You don't get to tell me to calm down. For the matter of this situation I'm being more calm than i should be. Don't stand in my way to see my brother. Not you mom." i said and turned my back at them. I stepped inside closing the door behind me. I stood there still. Not really believing we were here again. After all this work. He tried. He was better. I shouldn't have left him with them alone. "Justin?" I called in the cold room but he didn't answer. His skin was pale. The only sound in the room was the beeping of the monitor and the wind that entered the room through the window. A loud sigh left from me trying to remain calm. I sat down next to him and held his hand. Anger and sadness overflew me. I didn't know what to do. I slowly lowered my head to his hands and sat there. Tears streamed down my face. He must be so disappointed in his self. He doesn't deserve this. Suddenly he squeezed my hand. I looked up faster than i expected. I saw him looking at me smiling weakly. "I'm sorry douche. I failed you" he said. A tear left his eye and i quickly wiped it off with my thumb while shaking my head rapidly. I was crying but i didn't care at all "No. No. No you didn't. It's not your fault J. You tried. I should have brought you with me. I should have never let you stay with them. First thing we do once you're out of here is get you a place near mine. I'm never leaving you alone again. Not now. Not ever. I give you my word" he started crying harder making me hug him tightly. He made me some room and let me lie down with him in my arms. I whispered sweet nothings to him like 'it's gonna be okay' and 'i'm here'. My heart broke in half seeing him like that again. He was so disappointed in him. He cried himself to sleep while i sat there caressing his hair softly. I sang him a lullaby i used to sing him when we were little. He nuzzled his head against my neck and fell asleep shortly after. I laid there staring at the wall in front of us. Trying to gather my thoughts. Trying to see what we would do after this. How we could move past this. After some time i got up slowly so as not to wake him and went outside. Both of my parents looked at me. Worried about my next move. "Justin's going to live with me. After this. I'm never trusting him with you ever again. Am i clear?" I asked and they both nodded guilt written across their faces. "And because he's going to live with me you're going to give me a raise at the shop. If you have a problem i can happily quit and go work for someone else" i said sternly. My father knew that our relationship would never be the same again after this. I could see it in his eyes. He would never say no to me so he just nodded. As for my mother she knew i would never forgive her for what she allowed to happen. But i needed them to understand that i knew it too. "As far as you two are concerned i will never forgive you for what he's going through. I give you my word on that". They both nodded and i left to grab a cup of coffee. As i  waited there i started thinking about everything that has happened in the last twenty four hours. My whole world was turned upside down. My phone buzzed and i opened it looking at the screen. Nika texted me. Asking if i was okay. That girl is godsend i swear. But I can't deal with this now. I just can't. I need my space. Especially now. I stayed at the hospital days. Not informing anyone about my well being. My one and only concern now was Justin. But deep down i know Nika deserves an explanation for this.

Nika's pov

"Nope nothing at all" i said while Paige nodded. "She'll come around. Something clearly happened that upset her. She needs her time. If she didn't want you to be a part of her life trust me she would have given you the 'I'm not the kind of girl to commit to something and you deserve better' type of bulshit so until she says that we are good" she said trying to lighten up the mood. I chuckled at her tone and she made a little victory dance because she made me laugh. Truth is i haven't smiled much since she left. Some days passed and i hadn't heard from her. Paige and Azzi did literally everything they could to bring my mood up but nothing covered the fact that their best friend had left me empty without her presence. I knew it. They knew it as well. The only person that didn't seem to understand how much they meant to me was her. And that was our major problem. "What time is practice tomorrow?" I asked trying to change the topic of conversation. "11:30" Azzi said and i nodded. After a while the girls went to sleep. I had been staying at theirs for as much as i could so as not to think of her that much. Shortly after i went to sleep as well. I already knew what i would dream of that night. Still i was exhausted and needed to rest.

"GO FASTER COME ON?!" Geno shouted while we were running up and down the court. Looks like someone isn't having good days as well except for me. Coach was pushing us more than the usual and let me tell you i was ready to puke due to how much tired i was and how much i missed Shane. "Alright alright stop. Grab some water. Y'all are going to die otherwise" Geno said. I thanked god silently cause i knew for sure that i couldn't keep going for much longer. I looked at the exit as i used to do lately waiting magically that shane would appear and tell me it's okay to be tired. Suddenly i saw someone walking in. I ignored it at first but then thought that the posture of the person looked familiar. But after a minute of staring i realised that it was all in my head. I sighed and lookwd around trying not to cry right then and there. Azzi saw me and xame to hug me. I threw myself at her and sat in her arms trying to calm down. Both the physical and mental exhaustion was too much for me to handle right now. I was at the verge of collapsing. If you went through a dictionary and searched rhe word devastated, in the synonyms there would be my name and i am certain of it.

Sooo.... You know i love you right?? How are you doing my pookiesss. I hope y'all are great. Listen y'all need to trust me on this. I KNOW y'all don't like how this is going but trust me i know what I'm doingg. Please don't ghost read like or comment and please have faith. See you soonn

xoxo your favourite author 💋