I mean I did say I needed a big change so I guess this was it, it's Christmas Day and I'm upset, almost as if it's a routine, I don't think it's really hit me yet so I'm not sure how I feel, but maybe I'm regretful, maybe I should've treated her better, maybe I'm glad it's finally over and don't actually want her back in my life, maybe I texted her because I was bored and didn't meant most of what I said, or maybe I did, but she was cold, and that hurt, but maybe that just means she's moved on, because honestly, and I know I say this a lot but honestly, life doesn't always have to be so destructive, it's very possible that I'm just okay, everything doesn't have to be so dramatic.
I think my main life has been about trying to change myself, because only then will anyone love me, but that's not even the worst part, because changing myself is the only way I'll love myself, comparison is the thief of joy and I've been stealing my own happiness for years.
Maybe my one new years resolution can be to just be okay, and maybe be a little less dramatic, I would like to love myself, exactly as I am, and not want to change for anyone.
YOU ARE READING
Until she was happy
PoetryHappiness is a privilege and i talk deep so this whole book is a possible trigger warning. Don't look at this as a way to find peace in your darkness, this doesn't offer that, look unto this as a way to hurt with someone else, and find peace in the...
