First Love (Sekaiichi Hatsukoi)

Chapter 11

Onodera POV

Should I say it? I'll tell him what happened first. "Haitani San basically said when the time he confessed to me, he wanted to know if it was a Yes or No". Maybe if I just say that, he'll leave me alone.

"Did you say 'No'?"

"Of course I said 'No' "!

God, please don't tell me he'll ask more questions, I know he is. "When Haitani was speaking to me, you cut him off, what was he going to say"? Dammit, I'm so nervous. "H-How would I know"?! "Your the one who cut him off". He's smart, should I leave? No wait, nows a perfect time to ask him why he ignored me! "The hell with that! Why did you ignore me this whole morning"!?

"Haa"?

"Today, you didn't say a word to me, all you did was stare at me! You didn't even say 'Hi' to me! Was it because what I did yesterday, did I hurt you that much!? Did I hurt Takano San that bad"!? What did I just say right now? Takano's eyes widen, my hands started to shake. Oh no, this is embarrassing "I'm going home"! I got up off the couch when I felt Takano push me down laying me down on the couch. He sat on me, hovering over me, he looks serious. He cupped my face and said "I wasn't as hurt as you might think I was, Baka. Sorry if I made you think that. That's what you meant when you told me 'its you' at the office, cause of yesterday". He apologized, its like he knew already.

"...."

I stayed quiet, I don't know what to say now and he's on me so I can't escape. Takano looked at me and said "Did you and Haitani talk about anything else"? I have to just say it, my heart is beating fast, but what will he do if I tell him. He had my face cupped in his hands, I felt him take his hands off my face and he started to hold my hands tightly. He put his lips on mine, "mfphh"! I wanted to speak, but he started to kiss me with his tongue. Our tongues started to dance with each other, his hands started to hold mine tightly.

I can't tell if I can say I love him, those three words, it could change everything, even everything between us. What happens if something goes wrong, then what. I'll hurt myself again and I don't want to face that all over again. And what if I hurt Takano San again, what happens if I put him through that pain again. There's so much I'm thinking right now. It hurts too much to say it.

I felt Takano stop kissing me, he made me sit up and he started to hold me in his arms. He wrapped his arms around me and said "I'm scared, that one day I might not see you again, I don't want that to happen again. So please don't leave me, I don't ever want to face that again". He sounded sad when he said that, was he that hurt back then. The thing is that I hurt him and Yokozawa helped him get back on his feet again, am I that horrible?

I felt Takano grab my wrist and started to drag me somewhere. "T-Takano San! Where are y- GWAAAH"! He took me to his bedroom. Oh god no, I know what he's going to do. He threw me on the bed and hovered over me, with his arms on both side. He probably does that now since he knows I'll try to leave or push him off. "I don't know what you've been doing these past years, so tell me everything that happened through the past years, I don't want anything to be hidden Ritsu". He said it in a such a calming voice, it made me feel relaxed.

"I want to know everything about". Usually he's so mean and abusive to people, usually he's sarcastic, but right now he's holding me like I'm something precious and important to him. I don't want to tell him he makes my heart beat this fast, it hurts to much to say. "I love you, Ritsu". I grabbed onto the back of his shirt and held onto him, I don't want this cause Takano is......I want....

BUZZ BEEP BUZZ BEEP BUZZ BEEP BUZZ BEEP

My phone started to ring in my pocket, in all moments it has to ring. Takano got off me and said "Who the hell is that"? I looked at it to see who was calling me, it was Mutou Sensei. "Sorry, its from Mutou Sensei". He looks pissed off now, "Tch, answer it"!