25th November, 2014.
07.25 pmToday was sort of good and sort of bad. Good because Puneet was there and bad because he went home early. Not at home, actually, but in stall. But I can't do anything as it's his work.
You know what, he is off to Jaipur this Friday morning for four days due to a friend's function and I'm feeling so sad because he won't be there. :( He's right, you know, that I should stop being a baby who always wants her mom. He says, like that; I always want him. I dunno just what happens when he goes away from me. I start feeling bad and go insane. It's okay! Only four days... I can live without him.
It's just that I love him so madly. I dunno why do I act like a kid with him. I never do that with the others. I even eat faster than anyone when I'm at home or with my mates. But with him, something goes off and I eat slower and slower.
I still feel shy around him. When he comes to college in morning, till now, every day, I blush and look away. He's so attractive and magical. Why do I still feel shy after 11 months? Why do I feel nervous sometimes? I dunno any of these answers.
One more thing that I've learnt since Jan 2014 is that, he's very moody. Sometimes, he's all into bla bla bla, he's joking around, touching me and sometimes, he's all quite and even angry.
Don't you remember Fifty Shades Of Grey? It's the same with him. Fifty shades of moods. I choose every word correctly before speaking because God knows how his mood will be in a minute.
Like today, he was all talkative since morning, but suddenly in PS, he kept quiet. Hr won't even answer me and then finally, he fell asleep. Then when the class got over, he started behaving all nice and bla bla bla. He changes his moods like changing clothes. It's hard to understand which mood he's in and what might I speak. Because as usual, I talk like a stupid and in the end, there's yellings.
I get so confused sometimes thinking- Do I even know this guy? Or do I irritate him? Or how shall I not be like a baby? Etc. And endless questions.
But whatever might they be, let the world go upside down, I don't care! I just love him so badly.
Yours,
Rishika :)
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