Outcast

Chapter 21: Gone

She was gone, truly gone. I wanted to follow her so badly. I already felt hollow without her. I had to think of something else, anything! I decided to go to my room to have a shower. I entered the clock tower and somebody hit me from the side. I already knew it was Heidi, who was pushing me to the wall with the help of Chelsea. I could have brought them down to the floor without touching them, just mentally paralysing them, but I did not have the will to do it. My mind was focusing on one thing and one thing only. Sam. 

"What did you do to her? Do you know what kind of turmoil was going on inside her?" Chelsea asked me.

"I... Nothing. I don't have to give any explanations to you. Get off me or I'll have to paralyse you." I said. They took their hands off me and just as they were about to bombard me with questions I ran off to my room. I undressed and got in the bathtub. Her smell had rubbed off on me but as I bath it would eventually get weaker. 

Stop thinking about her!

I got in the bath and let the water run. What was going in with me? Sure she had left but how was I letting a girl manipulate me like this even when she's not here? She was just a girl... I could find millions like her and turn them! Nothing special. I would keep sticking to that theory until I get it in my head. I nodded determinedly. If I need a mate I would just wait until I find a very pretty one and turn her. She would not be difficult like Sam. She would just be with me without causing me to change. I'm a three hundred year old vampire. My ways are to kill and to feed. Nothing more. Nothing less. I rinsed off the foam and got out of the bath. I dried myself and got put a a fresh shirt, and my usual attire. I would go back dressing the way I was used to dress before she came. I put on the V chain and searched around the room for my painting brushes. I could do something to relax. I could paint.

I picked up my brushes and set up my aisle. I looked around me for inspiration. My gaze fell on my desk. Lying amongst my sketchpads was a photo. I picked it up and something changed inside of me. Who was I trying to fool? Myself? I could not forget her, not when everything surrounding me reminded me of her. Even if I threw every single thing that reminded me of her in anyway, including this photo, I would have to tear away my soul because she had branded me forever. I loved her. I could lie to everyone and act like she had never stumbled in my life but not to myself. I dropped my painting brushes and rushed outside. I sprinted out of the place, earning wry glances from some lesser guards who were walking by. I sped towards the vegetation, not really noticing where I was going. Suddenly my legs came to an abrupt stop. I looked around me, trying to figure out where my subconscious had led me.

I realised this was the spot were I had found her almost two years ago, looking for answers about what she was. If she would asked me that right now, I'd tell her she was the only woman on earth capable of driving me insane with her love. I felt the corners of my mouth quirk up. She had been so stubborn. She had that cute little frown in her face she gets when she's thinking hard. And her adorable lips had a pout to them. It was windy that day, and I could remember how her hair floated around her face like a halo. I petted the ground softly with a smile on my lips and went to the next place. When I arrived I saw the familiar tree with the unnatural dent on it. This was the time when I had almost kissed her and she pushed me away as she thought I was feeling pity for her. I ran my hands across the rough tree trunk and sprang off to my next destination, one of my very favourites. It was the first time that I started teaching her how to fight. I was so mad at myself for not teaching her sooner. I remembered how cute she was when she was angry. Her lips would pout and her eyes narrow slightly. It was the fist time we kissed. Well, just kissed is really the understatement of the century. I had been so hungry for her, after a whole year secretly wanting her and sneaking glances at her. She was not so reluctant either. She had spent two whole ears always in discipline of her actions. For the first time in years she allowed herself to just have fun and go with it. Lastly I went to my meadow. As usual the place looked peaceful. Everything looked the same since the last time I had visited the place with Sam. The long river was still flowing, the tree stood tall and proud, the grass was green, now slightly tinted orange with the beautiful setting sun. The only difference was that I was alone, with a shattered soul and a horrible sense of loneliness consummating me. I heard a dull thump from a few meters away. My sense of smell told me it was a deer. I had not eaten in days and I was thirsty. I didn't want to go back to the tower, and not just because I seriously needed to be alone, but because I was too destroyed to be able to destroy another couple of lives. I sprang in a fierce run and in matter of seconds the deer was dead in my hands. Ignoring its hideous smell I dipped my teeth in its skin. I sucked it dry out of blood, ignoring its disgusting taste. I went back to the meadow and climbed up the tree and made myself comfortable. I watched as the sun set behind some hills, leaving the world in darkness and welcoming the moon and the stars to replace it.