Scouting Legion High School [ An Attack on Titan Modern High School!AU ]

The Curse of El Diablo

"And that is how you find the length of the slide when only given the formula to find the speed in which Johnny accelerates to as he goes down the slide," Hanji concluded as she waved away a fly.

"Um, can you do that again?" Levi asked. While swatting away the same fly. Still, it buzzed around them while he talked. "But this time, say it 100% slower."

Hanji took a deep breath while brushing the fly off the table. "Sooooooooooooooooo yooooouuuuu-"

"Not that slow!" Levi interrupted as he used his folder to fan away the fly.

"Leviiiiiiiii-" hanji whined as she slumped back in her chair, trying to swat the persistent fly with her pencil. "I've already explained it to you eight times. Sure I like math, but not THAT much..." Suddenly she ninja-chopped the air in front of her as the fly almost landed on her face. Somehow it managed to dodge her every move.

"But you always go too fast," Levi stated as he waved the fly off again. "You bore me."

"But Leeeeviiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-"

"Explain it again!" Levi stated. This time, the fly buzzed onto his paper and rubbed its filthy string-like arms together.

Levi made the most disgusted face he could muster. "That tears it! You're going to die today, you little shit!" Levi stated as he held his calculator above his head and slammed it onto his math homework. Clearly he should have thought this through since there was now fly remnants splattered onto his homework (not that he made much progress... It was just gross).

"Tch," Levi picked up the paper between his fingertips and threw it away, returning to a very flabbergasted Hanji. Her eyes were wide open and so was her mouth. It almost looked like she witnessed the massacre of an orphanage.

Levi clicked his tongue again. "Tch. What are you-"

"YOU KILLED EL DIABLO!" Hanji bellowed for their entire study hall class to hear.

"I killed who?" Levi asked.

"El Diablo," Hanji answered as she shivered.

Levi stated at the girl, confused as hell. "First of all," he started off, "you already named a fly you knew for three minutes? Second of all, el diablo is the devil in Spanish."

"I know," Hanji whispered. Then she crept uncomfortably closer to Levi, making him cringe as her eyes burned holes into his soul. "But you killed El Diablo."

"I'm back," Erwin said returning from the restroom. "I am back from that pleasantly pleasurable piss."

"What the fuck, Erwin," Levi stated.

"LEVI KILLED EL DIABLO!" Hanji shouted. Erwin gasped dramatically as a response.

"And he threw him in the trash!" Hanji stated. This time, Erwin clung onto the desk for support as he clutched onto his left chest where his heart would be.

"What is this?" Levi asked.

"You will be cursed, Levi," Erwin gasped.

"What? No I won't-"

"Oh yes, you will," Hanji interrupted.

"I will not-"

"Yes you will," Hanji interrupted once again.

Levi, learning from the past, decided that it was pointless to fight back with her. "In what way am I going to be 'cursed'?"

"We don't know," Hanji answered.

"All we know is that you have invoked the wrath of El Diablo!" Erwin stated.

"You guys are weird," Levi said.

"El Diablo will get chu," Hanji stated.

"I'd like to see him try," Levi uttered.

Once again, his two friends gasped. "He has challenged the power of El Diablo!"

"What is this?" Levi asked. "Are we still talking about the fly or are you two secretly satanic?"

"Puede que despertar para encontrar la chubacabra en tu funda de almohada," Hanji recited.

"Did you just curse me in Spanish?" Levi asked. "Never mind, I'll just do my- where the hell is my calculator?"

"Está en la basura," Erwin said.

"English por favor!" Levi stated.

"It's in the trash can," Erwin answered.

"It's the CURSE!" Hanji shouted into the skies.

"There is no curse and I will prove it to you!" Levi rebutted.

And for the rest of the day, Levi walked around school all miserable and alone...

Mostly because that was his normal mood. Besides that, there was nothing out of the ordinary. Levi concluded from his experience that day, Hanji and Erwin were just being idiots.

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