Chapter Twenty-Five
Thankful to get out of the rain I sighed as I began to climb the stairs to the flat. I’d been at a performance which went well, but it was always such an anti-climax to come back to an empty flat.
I didn’t know what to think about last nights events, from Cheryl’s pleas and text last night she was adamant that it was nothing, but then what was it? I’d asked that question so many times today, yet still couldn’t get my answer.
I stopped dead as I walked around the corner towards my door, slumped up against the door on the floor was a very wet looking Cheryl, her hair was frizzing slightly and her eyes were red, she was sobbing hysterically.
“Oh my god Cheryl,” I exclaimed, quickening my pace at her obvious distress.
She stood up as soon as she registered I was actually here, “Kimberley,” she sobbed, clasping her arms around my neck and hugging me hard, something really wasn’t right.
I felt myself hugging back hard, but realising that we were still in the hall way and Cheryl was soaking wet, I pulled away from her and opened the door, letting her walk through infront of me.
“You must be freezing,” I said softly, closing the door watching her tiny figure waiting for me, stood in the middle of the room. “I’ll get you something dry,”
“No,” she said desperately, “Kimberley, I’m sorry, I’m sorry I put my career first, I know I treated you badly but –but,” she was sobbing so hard I couldn’t understand her.
“Cheryl,” I said, moving towards her and guiding her towards the sofa where she sat down and I followed, “please calm down you’re scaring me, what’s happened?”
She took a gulp, “I – I just realised that none of this is worth it without you, I don’t want any of this fame thing anymore, all I want is you – I swear what you saw at the club, it wasn’t me – well I mean it was me, but I didn’t want it, I honestly was pulling away – honest,” she wailed again, holding her head in her hands. “Please take me back,” she pleaded, boring into my eyes.
“Cheryl,” I soothed, “please don’t ask me to take you back it’s not a case of that, I can’t let you forget your dream because of me,”
She shook her head violently, “it’s not my dream, I had my dream, I was living with you and I was dancing – do you remember that time in school, we were in bed – after our first time and you asked me to tell me our future? Do you remember that?” She said, in very quick succession.
“Yes of course I do,” I said sadly, welling up, thinking back to how happy we were and no matter how old we were, I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Cheryl.
“Well I said that my future was with you – I had that and I was such an idiot to lose it, but I’ve realised now,” she said, she lifted her bum up a little bit and pulled a piece of paper from her pocket, “see this,” she said, holding it up but not really giving me enough time do have a proper look, “it’s the copy of the album contract – but this is what I think of it, I don’t want it, or the real one,” she lifted the paper up, scrunching it up ready to tear,
“Cheryl wait,” I said, stopping her from her actions, “please, give it a night, just think about what you’re doing – I don’t want you to regret this,”
“Look Kimberley, there’s billions of people in the world isn’t there?” I nodded, not quite sure where geography came into it, “well out of those billions of people, I know that the only person I want ever is you,”
I couldn’t help but smile, before my eyes leaked tears again, “I’m sorry I ever let you go,”
She moved closer towards me on the sofa and wiped my tears delicately as her own poured down her cheeks, “I’m glad you did, I know what I want now,” she sniffed.
“-But I didn’t try, I just couldn’t Cheryl, I couldn’t cope with it, I thought I would lose you eventually anyway, so I did it before, I was pathetic,” I sobbed, all the weeks feelings spilling out.
“Kimberley,” she sobbed herself, pulling me in so my head was on her chest, “I brought it on myself, I was wrapped up in it all, I put you second, someone like you doesn’t deserve to be second,”
This made me cry even more, which prompted her to cry even more, we were both wrecks, but for some reason being in this state together, although draining, felt good. I sat up and interlinked our hands, “please don’t rip up the contract, go for it, I promise I’ll be behind you as much as I can,” I tried to persuade her, I couldn’t live with messing up an opportunity for her like that,
She shook her head and smiled, “I appreciate what you’re trying to do Walsh, but believe it or not I don’t want any of it, I’ve had my five minutes, I don’t want anymore of it,” she said with a wobbly smile, holding my hands a little tighter.
“I don’t want you to regret anything,” I mumbled, looking down at our hands.
“My only regret is losing you,” she said softly.
As much as the words made my heart flutter, something quickly distracted me, “Cheryl? How did you get these bruises on your wrists?” I asked, worried at the dark colour of the small fingertip sized bruises on each of her wrists.
“Oh – there nothing,” she said, releasing her grip on my hands and pulling down her sleeves,
“No Cheryl where are they from? They look painful,” I persisted. She bit her lip and fresh tears poured from her eyes, “what’s wrong? Has someone hurt you?”
She nodded , still biting her lip, “oh my god,” I gasped, now it was my turn to pull her into my arms, “who did this?” I said, as she sobbed into my shoulder. Again she didn’t say anything, leaving me to pick at her, “was it Steve?”
She nodded against my shoulder and I squeezed her harder, “oh my god,” I wailed, beginning to cry again myself.
She pulled away from the hug and instead sunk into my body, “he really scared me Kim,”
“did he, do – you know – anything else?” I said, sick with the thought.
“No,” she said at once, “I was scared though, really scared,” she mumbled into my chest.
I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her head, “oh god baby,” I sighed, “I promise you never have to be scared again,”
She pulled herself up and looked into my eyes, “really? We can start things again?”
I nodded, so sure of what I wanted now, “of course, but I think we should take it slow, I want this to be right, so I’m going to sleep on the sofa tonight,”
“Kimberley,” she sighed, “you don’t have to do that,”
“as much as it is hard to say that, I just want you to have a night, just in case you change your mind,”
“I’ve told you, I won’t,” she persisted, taking my hands.
I smiled weakly, “please Cheryl, for my own piece of mind,”
“okay,” she said, admitting defeat.
“You’re not mad are you?” I questioned,
“No – no of course not,” she said, kissing both my hands, “I’ve just missed you,” she shrugged.
I smiled, “I’ve missed you to,” feeling myself well up again, taking her in my arms.
Eventually she released herself from me and smiled, “well I guess I better go to bed, otherwise we’re going to drown in our own tears,” she sniffed.
“Okay,” I said softly. “You know where I keep my pyjamas, just help yourself,”
“Okay, thank you,” she replied, as we both stood up, “goodnight Walsh,” with that she kissed me on the cheek and moved towards my bedroom.
I walked around the living room in a bit of a daze after that, not quite sure what had become of my night, just hours ago I was miserable and now I felt the complete opposite, just wanting to make sure Cheryl had everything she needed and partly because I wanted to see her again I headed towards the bedroom and walked in and gasped at what I saw, my jaw dropping,
“what?” She smiled, knowing exactly what I was looking at.
