Love Is Yellow

chapter 24 - Rin

As I finished dinner, alone, I scowled at Len's text:

Can't make it for dinner, something came up, sorry!

"Argh!"

I hate eating dinner alone, actually, I just hate being alone... Lenka and Rinto had both gone out for dinner to who knows where.

A car drives up, and I pause, Len? It was too early for Rinto or Lenka, they only left about ten minutes ago. I rush outside but stop in my place when I realize who he's with, Akita.

'He said he was going over there, but did he seriously skip our dinner just to spend time with her? This can't be....I can't let her take him, I can't lose to someone who isn't even popular!'

They get out of the car, and walk over to the side of three house without even a glance towards me, I follow them quietly, ready to interrupt what's about to happen if need be.

"I'm so sorry about this, I can't believe she made you stay for dinner... and the things she said before that, the conversation she had in the car!"

Len just chuckled and responded with, "Relax Neru, it's okay, there was one thing she said though..."

"What did she say?" Akita asked, worry filling her voice.

"Well, you were there... she was more talking to you, than me, really," Len said, giving a laugh.

"What did she say?" Akita asked again, more desperately this time.

"Well, just that you had talked about me before we had even met... what was that about?"

Akita's eyes widened and her face turned red as she couldn't think of anything to say.

"N-nothing!" She eventually stammered, shoving Len away.

He approached her, carefully, and chose his next words with precision,"It doesn't sound like it's nothing..."

Akita mumbled something I couldn't hear, but I guessed it was along the lines of, "Well it is."

"Why won't you just tell me? I won't laugh at you, everyone has their own feelings, you must have yours."

"I don't feel like it."

"Neru-"

"Don't, you don't have the right to Neru me into saying whatever you want me to. You're not my mom, you're not my dad, you're not my brother, or even my friend! You're just the guy who's been impossibly out of my reach since day one, but you wouldn't understand that!"

"I don't know what you're trying to say," he answered quietly, giving me my perfect opportunity.

"Come on Len," I said, walking next to him, "she said it clear as day."

Their faces were a combined look of confusion, disbelief, and anger.

"Rin?"

"You were listening in on us?"

I smirk and continue talking,"What Akita here was trying to say is that she's had this giant crush on you for like forever."

Akita got mad, really mad. She pushed me and I fell to the ground, then she ran off. Len looked at me, then her, trying to decide what to do, and then decided.

He followed her, and I felt my heart shatter. How could someone like her mean more to him than I do? I had thought that this would all blow over in a painful week or two, and that Len would come running back to me apologizing. I had figured that we'd get back together; I never even considered the possibility of her replacing me...

I got up slowly, and walked in their general direction. The car that they had arrived in was driving away, leaving Len to stand awkwardly in the drive way, looking heartbroken.

"Len," I said softly.

He turned to face me, and erupted into anger, "What Rin? You couldn't let me have one talk without you? She was crying, Rin! She probably won't talk to me again! How could you?"

"So what? Akita isn't that important. She's just a wannabe. A wannabe Miku, and a wannabe me by the looks of her haircut!"

"What did you call her?" He asked, making me freeze. A week ago he would have laughed, maybe even agreed, but now...

"You heard me! I said she's a wannabe, is this the best you could do? Get someone who sorta, but isn't even close to, looking like me? Is this your way of dating me without taboo? Cause this is pathetic! She isn't worth the trouble, you don't even know her!" I scream, losing my temper.

He glared at me and walked off, leaving me outside to wonder what in the world just happened.

After a few minutes of being cold outside, I make my way inside. Len's door is closed, and as I pass it I hear a song playing... it's an Akita cover, Promise, by the sound of it.

I sink to the floor, leaning against his door. She's singing with Yowane Haku, a failure by society's views. 'It's a shame,' I allow myself to believe, 'I don't like either of them, but at least they mean what they sing... when Miku and I recorded this, neither of us meant a word of it.'

I listened along to the song, going over the dance in my head, lip singing every word.

The song ends and switches to her cover of Tokyo Teddy Bear, and I cringed slightly. None of us had really known her in person, we just knew that she was in Miku's grade and was the new source of entertainment.

All of us went along with what Miku told us to do, never once stopping to consider how Akita felt on the other end. According to Miku, she started skipping school. However, I only noticed that she started following Len. She followed Len on every social media she could, and I watched her as a hawk.

She had gotten a job so she could pay for tickets to one of his concerts, shared his lesser known songs, and talked about how she'd love the chance to meet him. Akita never once went on about how she was bullied, or how her dad had left (we learned this later from Miku, who had heard from Kaito, who heard from Akaito), or even about how she loved to sing... No, all of her posts were about Len, all Len.

I sighed softly as I try to imagined what would have happened if Miku had never chosen Akita as our victim.

'We never would have bullied her, so she'd never turn to Len for security, she'd never turn into a love sick puppy. She most likely wouldn't stop making covers, but that didn't matter, she was never very popular anyways. We wouldn't be in the situation we're in now, because Len wouldn't even know she existed, none of us but Miku would. Akita would have been a nobody, she wouldn't have mattered, she would have been able to live her life and we'd be able to live ours.'

The song pulled to a close, and I got up. I didn't need Len finding me at his door then getting mad again. I made my way to my room, and laid on my bed. Tears fell from my eyes as I realized just how complicated my life was, what a terrible person I've been, and how I'd probably never catch Len's eye again - it was a miracle that I had ever caught it in the first place.

***
Sorry, it's a little shorter than normal, but better then nothing, right? Oh, and sorry if it bothers anyone that I can't stay in one tense, and if you guys can't notice and I screwed myself over by pointing it out, oh well... it's the only thing I absolutely hate about my writing, I have to edit it ten times just to get all of it in the same tense... does anyone else have this problem, or is it just me? Any tips on how I could fix it? I plan to edit all of these chapters later, it's just early right now... anyways, please leave a comment. They're so much more helpful than a vote, so I don't even care if you don't vote, just please comment. I'd love to hear what you guys think. Have a great day.