I'd Like to be Somebody Else

Chapter 71

"Long time no see." I heard someone say behind me.

She was right, it was a voice that I hadn't heard in three years. I didn't mean to lose touch with her but the situation dictated it. I had no idea if Jamie had told her that there had been an us, I didn't know if Jamie's Mum had told her about catching us in bed together. She didn't sound at all angry but if she was, she had every right to be.

I quickly got to my feet and blurted "Sorry."

I didn't know what I was apologising for, for being here, for losing contact, for what happened with Jamie, for moving on with Noel and Liam, for making someone else a Nan, not her. It didn't matter, I was sorry.

She had a fresh bouquet of flowers to put on her son's grave.

"Don't be darling, we all deal with life in our own ways." She smiled that reassuring, difficult smile everyone gave me when Luke died.

She moved towards the grave and noticed Jimmyi in his carseat. "Who's the little one?"

"He's my son." The words were harder to say than I thought they'd be, I felt the lump in my throat, I felt them having to force their way out. "J, Stephen."

She knelt down and had a closer look at him. "He's a stunner, isn't he?"

I didn't know what to say, he was because he took after his Daddy but I really didn't want to talk about his Daddy so I just said "Yeah."

She replaced the flowers, the withered ones for the new and got to her feet again. "Shall we go back to mine, have a catch up and a cuppa?" she suggested.

I didn't want to, of course I didn't want to but I went anyway. I carried Jimmyi's car seat and followed her to the cemetery gates.

"Thought you'd be here." Jamie said as we almost crashed into each other, he looked a bit panicked. "Liam's been calling."

Lukes Mum gave us a look. "Who's Liam?"

"Stephen's uncle." I answered her quickly. "Why's he, what's he want?"

"Mainly to know where where his nephew's gone."

"He's on tour, what does he care?"

"On tour?"

"He's a musician, Auntie." Jamie answered. "You disappeared with Noel's son. D'you not remember last time you came here unannounced?"

I should've just told Peggy or left a note but I wasn't thinking about anyone but Luke. "I just needed some time here, alone.

"Let's get yous two inside quick, you shouldn't be out here like this in March." Luke's Mum told me.

"It's your Beemer in the car park, isn't it?" Jamie asked, knowing full well it was.

I pulled the keys out of my pocket and passed them to him.

He drove us to Luke's Mum's house. He rang Peggy and assured her we were safe while we stood in the kitchen.

"So, are you going to tell me about this Noel?" Luke's Mum asked as she made us tea.

She wasn't nosy but it felt like it then.

"Do you read much celebrity news?" I asked, needing to know if she'd read anything about Oasis already.

"They're famous then? I don't bother with chip paper, all that obsession with celebrity isn't worth the ink and paper."

"Noel, Stephen's Dad is Oasis' guitarist and songwriter."

"What, the front page, Manc scally Gallagher brothers?" She turned to look at me for a moment.