I'd Like to be Somebody Else

Chapter 73

Noel avoided me the best he could, he wouldn't even look at me never mind speak to me. I didn't understand why he'd reacted this badly.

Guigsy looked like he was in a terrible state. He was avoiding Noel as much as Noel was avoiding me. It looked like they'd actually fought last night.

I grabbed Noel when they got back into the stadium, deciding I'd make him listen.

"Come with me, even if you can't talk, please hear me out." I told him before leading him to the pitch.

"We aren't allowed here." Noel pointed out as I got him to walk to the goalline.

"I promise I won't kick up the grass." I rolled my eyes, he cared more about his stupid football ground than me. "I needed you to be somewhere special."

"Why?" he asked pretty vacantly as he leant against the goal post.

"Because I love you." I looked into his Gallagher blue eyes, expecting them to light up. "You are as special to me as the back of the net is when it catches a mighty goal and as precious as the woodwork when it deflects an opposition winner."

"You can't just..." he attempted to argue I was wasting my time but cut himself off to watch me.

I got down on one knee and fished the ring (a simple silver band) I'd "borrowed" from Liam's room out my pocket. "Noel, will you marry me? I don't want anyone else but you. I want us. I want our family."

"Think I was meant to say all that." he commented as he reluctantly took the ring. "You're around Liam too fucking much, you've started acting like him."

I prayed he didn't recognise it was his brother's as I got to my feet. "I didn't mean to rain on your parade, you weren't going to, we're you?"

He pulled a black box from his pocket. "I was, until yesterday." He hid it again, apparently he no longer had any intention of giving it to me.

"Why are you mad at me?" I asked as he passed the ring back.

"The first, the first chance you got, you chose to get off your head." He said sounding serious and hurt.

"That's terrible but the fact you snort anything you can get your hands on is just fucking fine, right?" I asked sarcastically.

"When I'm on tour, yeah I do, so fucking what?" he replied like a moody teenager. "I don't when I'm anywhere near my son."

"Neither do I, that was the first time since your birthday... I knew I'd be fine long before we get home, what's your problem?"

"You tried to cheat, a-fucking-gain and you were so gone, you didn't even know you were doing wrong." he pointed out. "There's no way I'll ever marry you. As your husband, I wouldn't put up with you doing what you do."

He hadn't genuinely forgiven me, he'd just bottled it up every time. "I just wanted to have fun like yous do, all the time. It was just a kiss, Noel."

"It's never just a kiss with you. Your quickie in the bogs speech ring any bells?" He reminded me of our kiss at the Beatles museum.

"I wasn't going to have sex with Anna." I objected. "I'm not into girls that much, you know I'm not."

"You had a child." He pointed out, ignoring what I'd said. "You wanted to settle down, you decided you didn't want this anymore." He raised his arms as though standing in this stadium represented his lifestyle.

"Liam said you went off last night... Where did you go?" I asked, ignoring him back.

"'Round Kenzie's."