She Told Me Not to Worry (SEQUEL to He Told Me Not to Tell) COMPLETE

54

Demi's POV

It's been nearly a week since I confronted Kenzie about her cutting, but it feels so much longer. She says she's doing better, but I'm not quite sure. She's been even more quiet than she was before. She's been more distant, as well.

I still can't believe I've let this happen. I thought I had done well enough in raising her that this wouldn't be an issue. I thought I had always shown her how much she is loved and cared about.

But the past never goes away, it's never forgotten. The words stick with you, no matter how many years pass.

I always told her to never believe what her father had told her before, but I know the words are impossible to completely ignore.

I never talked to her specifically about self harming. I never talked to her about the dangers of it, and I especially never told her about my experiences. I have always been too nervous to. I was scared that if I explained my experiences to her, she would become more curious and try it for herself. Obviously, me keeping my secrets didn't keep her from self harm.

I just wish I knew a way to prevent it all. I wish I could go back in time before this all started, and figure out a way to convince Kenzie to never cut. But I knew, of course, that was impossible.

-

One night while getting ready for bed, Kenzie knocked on my door.

"Come in," I responded.

An anxious Kenzie in her pajamas quickly pushed the door open. She seemed quite shaken.

"Kenzie, are you alright?" I ask, trying not to sound too nervous.

"Where did you put them?" She asked timidly.

"What?" I asked.

"My blades. I-I need one." Her voice was shaky and panicked.

I sat on my bed, trying to stay calm for her sake. "Baby, no you don't."

She nodded her head in response. "Yes I do. It's the only way to make them stop," she explained, her voice cracking slightly.

I knew exactly what she was talking about. I knew how it felt to constantly have something encouraging the harm.

I stood up and walked over to her. As soon as I wrapped my arms around her, she broke down in tears.

"They're so loud, I can't think," Kenzie managed to get out.

"I know, it's okay," I comforted her.

"I just want them to go away," she cried.

"You just have to fight through it, Kenzie."

"I can't."

"Yes you can," I assured her. I rubbed her back, trying to calm her down. "I know you can. I'm here to help you."

"Mom, just let me make one, please, just one," Kenzie begged.

"Absolutely not," I said firmly. "Don't give in."

"Please," she whispered.

Without saying another word, I brought her over to my bed and laid down with her. She continued to cry into my chest as I stroked her hair and rubbed her back. I let her cry everything out while assuring her that I was there, and I wasn't going to leave her.

Eventually, her crying let up and became snuffles. I pulled away just enough to look at her, and she looked back up at me with eyes so full of pain.

"Better?" I asked.

All I got was a nod before she laid her head back down.

"Can I stay in her with you tonight?" She asked weakly.

"Of course," I responded. I kissed the top of her head before tightening my grip on her. "I'm so proud of you."