She Told Me Not to Worry (SEQUEL to He Told Me Not to Tell) COMPLETE

53

Kenzie's POV

I went straight to bed after dinner. I just wanted the day to end. Ever since I woke up, it's just gotten worse.

Sleep. That's the only escape from reality. I enjoy being asleep more than awake. That is, of course, until the nightmares.

They're so haunting. They never go away, they never leave me alone. And they all involve the same person.

My father.

Whatever it is, a dream or a flashback, he's always there. He's either taking me away from Mom, beating me, or worse.

I can't get rid of him. After all of these years, he decides to come back into my life, bringing back the memories and haunting dreams.

What did he want? Why wouldn't he just go away? Why wouldn't he leave me alone.

I was just happy with Mom and Nick, until he reappeared. Now it feels like I can't escape him. He's always on my mind.

I couldn't sleep thinking about all of this. I became too scared to sleep. So I was laying in the silence, alone with my thoughts. It wasn't necessarily a good thing.

I thought about everything that's been going on lately.

I thought about my father and how he's continuing to ruin my life.

I thought about the twitter account and how I promised myself it wouldn't effect me. I failed.

I thought about Mom knowing about my cuts. Is she hiding her anger towards me? Does she secretly hate me? Does she regret adopting me now? She said she understood, but does she really? She doesn't know how I feel. I hate myself, she wouldn't know what that's like.

That's when my thigh started to itch.

"You have to cut," they told me.

"I can't," I said to myself in my head. I knew I didn't have my blades anymore. Mom took them.

I could always take them back. She's asleep, I have plenty of time to search for them.

No, I can't. If she ever found out I started again, she would probably disown me, send me somewhere. I couldn't let that happen.

So I toughened up. I won't let my thoughts make me do anything. Mom is more important to me, I can't let her down again.

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