Feelings...

No..

   I hate life. I hate it so much. I just can't deal anymore.  I'm happy with my friends. Happy with my boyfriend and our dog. I can't stand my family. And I'm stuck. I am so so deeply stuck and it makes me hate life. It makes me want to rip my chest open and pull out my lungs and heart. I'm tired of being abused. Tired of always being in the wrong even if I had no part in it. I'm tired of being hurt. And crying.  And scared. I'm tired of putting all this on my boyfriends shoulders. I'm just really fucking tired. I'm drained. I've fought too much, everythings just shutting off. My lungs don't want to work. My eyes just want to cry. I just want to sleep. I want to sleep for days on end. I want to be ok. I want to be fixed.  I don't want to hurt anymore.  I've hated life before. For years. I don't want to be the same person I used to be.. But I'm afraid I'm going to be pushed to it...

   Nobody should have to go through this.  And I'm sorry if anyone reading this does. And you could message me anytime you need to.