"Hello?" Pt. 1

January 17th, 2016

"So, you just happened to 'briefly date' the artist from last night?"

"It was years ago. Why is this relevant?"

"Did you not see one of his artwork?"

"You have to be more specific."

"Oh, you know, the one where it shows you. Naked. On a bed."

"That was not me."

"Are you sure, because it certainly looked like you."

"It wasn't me. I think I would remember posing naked on a bed for him to paint me. It was probably another girlfriend of his. Gregorio has a type and let's just say he's had a lot of his type."

"If that's what you say. So, how the hell did you end up dating a graffiti artist?"

"Never call him a graffiti artist. He hates that. Street artist or urban artist, thank you. His mother is French, my mother is French. Us half-French kids have got to stick together. We met, dated for a while, broke up and moved on."

"Just how many guys have you dated?"

"Dated or had sex with? I feel like you're asking one question but really you want an answer to another question. So, which do you want to know?"

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"You looked amazing last night."

"Huh? I mean, pardon?"

"I liked your dress last night. You looked very nice."

"Thank you. You didn't answer my question, though."

"I know. I'm avoiding it."

"I got that. Right, let's change the topic. What did you think of the exhibit last night?"

"You want an honest opinion? I hated it. Gregorio Aneiro is not my type of artist."

"You like the old stuff, huh? Pre-Raphaelite, I bet. If it's Hurst or Emin, I'm hanging up."

"Georgia O'Keeffe, actually."

"How was the date, then? Better than the artwork, I presume."

"Not really. Felicity was... interesting. A little too kooky for my tastes, but at least it got my grandmother off my back for a while."

"Too kooky? Kookier than me?"

"Most definitely."

"No! Not possible! Man, I got to step up my game! Kooky Crown is mine."

"Well, after that outburst, I think your crown is safe."

"Win! On a serious note, what was wrong with Felicity?"

"She wasn't..."

"Wasn't, what?"

"Nothing. She just wasn't my type."

"What is your type?"

"Um, well, it used to be blue eyed blondes with legs that went on for days. Now, I don't know. It's not like going for my usual type has got me anywhere in the past."

"Then maybe Felicity is the girl you need after all."

"No, she isn't."

"Don't give up. I'm sure there's a redhead or a brunette out there for you. You've just got to be more open to possibilities."