It has been a good three days since i tried to kill myself, other than not being allowed out of mums sight. I was sat on my bed tired before dropping off for a hour before waking back up still on the early hours of the morning, still so tired.
I got up early this morning and went over to my desk, I couldn't sleep so i chose to do some maths, not work from school as I'm not allowed back to any schools because I can't be trusted. So basically I've screwed my life up for good.
I must have been sat here for around 1 hour when my alarm went off it was 8:30, I turned my alarm of when Aaron came into my room telling me to get dressed. "We're going to the beach" he tells me and I look confused to why though.
I go over to my wardrobe and pull out my cream colored jumper, my grey long sleeved top, my dark blue skinny jeans and put them on. I put my grey infinity scarf with my grey mid calf socks adding my creamy colored mid calf ugg boots
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When I had got dressed I put my phone in my pocket and went down stairs. I walked into the living room/ kitchen where mum was finishing packing a picnic basket. I sit on the sofa watching mum pack the basket when Aaron came in an poked me and I giggle at him.
Soon we were setting off to the beach, it's like mum was creating a day from the past. I remember being little and Aaron would want to look for treasure on the beach and me and mum would build sandcastle, I would say it's our new home and smile sweetly.
We were soon at the beach and mum got the basket out and we walked into the beach and put the blanket down before all sitting on it. We were having fun and not worrying about anything. Aaron found a fossil and it looked old,
Soon we were talking and was daydreaming. I didn't remember the last time we had came to the beach, I don't know if I was born but I might have been. "Remember the last time we came to the beach" Aaron says to mum and she smiles "you said it was the best day ever"
"Avery was only 1, she crawled into the sea and splashed you" Aaron laughs looking at mum and I frown not remembering it. It was 14 years ago and I feel so stupid not remembering which seemed like the best day ever. Today was a great day too.
Mum left me and Aaron on the sand while she went to find an ice cream van, she soon comes back with three people vanilla ice cream. What's the beach without an ice cream. Mum say back down and we ate our ice cream and Aaron asked mum is she had penny's.
Soon we went home and I went up to my room, I wanted to get change into my pjs so I went to my room and found my unicorn onesie and put it on and putting my phone on charge. I left my room and stood at the top of the stairs hearing what Aaron was telling mum.
He was telling her about what happened to him when we were younger, I ran to my room not wanting to remember it again. I felt so pained when the memories come back, I lied on my bed trying to stay calm. The last thing I remember was my phone playing a text tone before I fell asleep
A/N Sorry it's short, I have been having trouble writing and stressed with college, but I'm going to try and update again soon. Please like Please comment your opinions Please comment answering these questions 1) do you think Aaron will tell Chas about Gordon hurting/sexual assaulting Ava when she was 5 2) how do you think Ava Is going to cope with Evreything 3) what do you think should happen with Ava's friendship with her ex boyfriend and her old friend.
