Always Loved {Jacksepticeye X Reader} #Wattys2016 (Completed)

I'm Still Here

Your POV

You have been lost for awhile now. Giving birth was a hard thing to do since Sean wasn't there for the delivery with you. You were mad at yourself.

You have tried to attempt suicide about three times now but Felix stopped you from doing that thing. You had secretly lived with Felix and Marzia for three years now. Nobody knew but them.

they helped you take care of Autumn and Nixon, who never knew that they had fathers. Yet, they were only three. That means Sam was six and already in kindergarten. That, you wanted to see.

Though, you knew that something was holding you back to see your "husband" and children. Whenever you think of them, you feel like your going to puke. It's bad yet you feel like it's a sign for something.

But today, you had planned something. You knew that Sean would never leave where he lives so you sent two pictures of your children, Nixon and Autumn.

"Should I say who it's from?" You asked to Felix who was watching from the other side of the counter.

"No don't. Then he will know and try to find you. Just put a fake address here in the U.K. and only put the names, weight, height, and age of the children on the back of the photos." Felix answered.

"Where are the kids?" You asked.

"They are with Marzia. She wanted some time with them because, you know her, she loves kids." Felix said smiling and shrugging.

"Awesome. That means I can go to the post office without worrying about the kids." You said getting up.

"I want to come with you, just to be safe." Felix said.

"Okay, come with me. I don't care." You said shrugging.

---

You and Felix came home panting with sweat dripping from your foreheads. Marzia noticed and wondered what happened.

"They found me. I need to leave." You said in a panic nod hurry mode.

"Wait, who's 'they'?" Marzia asked.

"No one. We just raced here." You said smiling and walking into the kitchen.

"Oh you are such a little lier!" Marzia called.

"Yeah, I know. Hey, where are the kids?" You asked.

"Sleeping. I put them in their room upstairs and shut the door tight, like you do." Marzia answered.

"Well, aren't you great with children." Felix said sitting by her.

"Why don't you two have kids?" You asked.

"Because, it's too much work and we're lazy." Felix said standing up.

"Oh boo-hoo. I gave birth to three children. It's not that hard. Though, loosing the weight afterwards is hard. But not that hard." You say leaning against the wall.

"Whatever. Still, I don't know." Felix said.

"Eh, whatever. You guys do what you want and I do what I want." You said heading into the kitchen.

"Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, wait a minute pal. You need to explain something." Marzia said coming towards you.

"What!? What do you want? All I wanted was a granola bar. Is that too much?" You asked pulling one out of the box.

"No, that's totally fine. I just want to talk to you for a second." She said.

"If it's about Sean, I swear to god I'm going to live on the streets, in the ally way, with my children and not care at all." You said taking a bite out the granola.

"No, that's not it." She said.

You glared at her. She took a deep breath and set her head down. You smirked evilly and pointed your granola bar at her.

"I told you. I don't want to talk about him anymore. I'm still here. I set my line for when I want to come back. Seriously. Plus, I got a new phone so he can't text me. Now, excuse me while I go eat my granola." You said walking away.

"You don't feel any regret or guilt?" Marzia asked behind you.

You stopped in your tracks and looked over you shoulder. You face went from confident to sad and depressed. Marzia smiled and walked over to you.

"You need him. I can tell. You've been acting way too differently from when I know you. You were happy, no matter what. But, I can see it your eyes. You're wearing a mask. You don't want to show that you're hurt." Marzia said turning you around fully and placing both of her hands on your shoulders.

Tears were forming in your eyes as your head hung low. There, you knew that she found the truth and that you want to head back to Sean.

"Marzia..."

"Yeah?"

You looked in her eyes with a tear spilling out.

"I want to go home..." You whispered.

You hugged her tightly and cried on her shoulder as Marzia hugged you back.