My Racist(completed)..undergoing some editing

chapter 25

(Before you start reading this,exercise your smiles and your throat...hope you all like it and leave feedbacks if you do)

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I'm in-love with you,
And am in no buisness of,
Denying myself the pleasure,
Of saying True things.
-F.o.s.

Derek.

I watched her staring out at the opened window,her attention fixed on the moon light and mine on her.

I didn't know where to start from or how to apologize but today was the day I would man up and tell her how she made me feel.Right now,I was not thinking of my father or the consequences I was just thinking of only her and following my heart.

That was what love does did to you right? but was it love that drove me to this or just insanity?

Whatever was happening  to seemed extremely stupid all together.

"Derek." She cried out, panicked and scared."watch out"

I quickly turned my attention back to the road and gripped hard on the steering wheel,putting all my will to control my ride from running into the tree.

"Hold on,Sel. " I said, trying to hide the fear in my voice and trying to control the fucking wheel. I missed tree by an inch stopping the car at the middle of the road with a deep right turn.

"Are you okay?"I asked as our heads jerked back slamming hard on our seats.

"Yes." She forced a smile."you?"

"Am so sorry." I ignored her question,scanning her face for any injuries.

"It's okay." She replied.

"No it's not. And I am not apologizing for the almost accident."I said, breathless.

"Were just friends" She said."And you can do anything you want to do....thats why my father left me after all"She said and turned her attention to the wind screen.

Her words shattered me but also fumed me."I have said sorry over and over again..what more do you want me to do?" I retorted.

Her head rose up from my statement."You are blaming this on me?" She managed to say.

"No..but it I don't see why you can't just accept an apology."I mumbled and looked away from her.

I knew I was meant to beg and kneel for her to listen to my explanation but when she classified me as friends,it made me boil and also I never apologized for anything.I hated that word...Sorry.

"You kidding right?Five days ago...you injected your finger into a girl and insulted me and now you are blaming me?" She shouted.

She had really improved in english maybe because of me or the heated arguments we were always having.

"If you had just listened to me that morning...that wouldn't have happened." I fired.

She stared at me with a horrified expression but I couldn't bring myself to say the right words.It was much easier sleeping with her underwear.

"You know...I always wondered what happened after the parking lot."She said,her voice held no emotions inside.Her frame had been cracked and I saw through her that any wrong word I said next would end my closest thing to hope I ever knew.

"Don't go there." I shut my eyes.

"You....did...but...I" She couldn't find the right words and neither could I.This all went better when I imagined it.

I thought she forgave me at the dinner party but some things couldn't be forgiven.

She finally looked away from me and swung the car door open.I clenched her underwear tighter which was safely tucked in my pocket and went after her.