Here We'll Remain>>C.G

Part 3

Thea's PoV

      When I wake up the next morning, I take full advantage of the working showers. The hot water is something I will never take for granted again.

   Once I was finished, I grabbed a granola bar and headed to my favorite part spot in Alexandria; the lake. I sat on the dock and took in my surroundings. In the distance, I saw a few of the other teenagers that lived here walking casually down the street. I rolled my eyes at them; well, one in particular. Ron Anderson.

     There was no hope for that boy. No matter how much I explained the outside world to him, he didn't seem to get it. He thought he was invincible. Truthfully, he was acting just like me when the apocalypse first started. In the old days, I thought this would all just blow over and I'd live happily ever after with my family.

     That was before I discovered what loss felt like. Discovered the harshness of the new world we now live in. I shook my head, trying to clear my mind of all thoughts that reminded me of the beginning. I couldn't change the past.

     I closed my eyes and let out a long sigh. Then, I was rudely snapped out of my trance by someone putting their hand on my shoulder.

    I instantly sprang up and put my hand on my belt that usually held my knife. When I finally registered who it was, I relaxed slightly.

"We have to stop meeting like this," Carl smiled. I smiled back faintly.

"We would stop meeting like this if you would stop sneaking up on me, or trying to talk to me in general" I mumbled, crossing my arms. He rolled his eyes and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Touche," he muttered sheepishly.

"So besides my sterling personality, what brings you here to talk to me?" I asked sarcastically. He rolled his eyes at me again. It made me want to smack him upside the head.

"Deanna is throwing a party tonight and I was wondering if you were going," he rushed out and stuffed his hands in his pockets. I immediately shake my head. There's no way in hell.

"I'm not going to any party. I try to avoid the people here. It's kinda my thing," I told him firmly. I watched as his face dropped. He paused and bit his lip. It looked like he was debating something in his head. I tapped my foot impatiently.  He looked down at the ground as he inhaled.

"Don't hurt me for asking, but why do you want to avoid them? I mean I get that they aren't the smartest people in the world, but they're people. They're safe" he says quietly. I shake my head in disbelief. Maybe he's gone through tough times, but to say that people are safe isn't right. Maybe his group is. Maybe some of the people here are safe. But the people I've been with so far, were not.

"Are people really safe? I know from experience that the walkers are not our biggest threat. People are. Being alone eliminates that threat. No sadness and loss that way" I explained looking out at the water in the lake. He quieted again. At least he thinks before he speaks.

"I've lost a lot of people I care about in this world. My mom, my best friends, and I even almost lost my sister. I get loss, I do. It sucks, but I wouldn't go on my own. My group...No family has helped me through it all. It's better to love someone and lose them, then not take the chance to get to know them and miss out on a great opportunity. You never know who could end up meaning the most to you" he confessed me before turning and walking away.

      I felt tears prick the side of my eyes. He sounded so sincere and broken. I believed every word he told me. It sounds like he's been through hell. He knew what he was talking about. He slightly understands what I said. I bit my lip and clenched my fists in frustration.

The worst thing about his speech is that he's completely right.

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      Later that night I still hadn't decided if I was actually gonna go to the party or not. I didn't want a 'I told you so' from Carl if he saw me there.

     I sat on my bed and stared at the wall. Maybe if I just make a quick appearance and then left, people would be satisfied.

Why the hell do I care if the people are satisfied?

      I groaned and fell back onto my bed, now staring aimlessly at the ceiling. This is why I don't talk to people. Decision making is too difficult. I mean, I knew Carl was right, but I can't change that quickly. If I even wanted to change at all. I've been this way for over a year now. It's hard to break a habit.
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  Well, I didn't say habits were impossible to break. That's what I say to myself as I arrive at the party. I stood outside of the house it was being held in and just stared into the windows. Seeing everyone inside inside acting like they had no cares in the world.

     I just couldn't make my feet carry me through the door. It's like they were glued to the pavement. Maybe this whole party thing was a bad idea and I should just turn around and go home. Yep, that's what I was going to do. At least I tried. Right?

Wrong.

A voice came up behind me and broke me out of my internal battle that I was having with myself.

"Are you okay?" A feminine voice asks me. I looked over in her direction. I didn't know her. I've actually only seen her once. She was a part of Carl's group.

      When I didn't answer her, she continued. "Trust me, I don't wanna go in there either. There's just something about having a party at the end of the world that just doesn't sit right with me," she mutters, "I'm Sasha". Well I liked her already.

"My name's Thea. And you're right. I don't think parties should be a top priority" I stated. She smiled and nodded her head in agreement.Then she paused and just stared at me. I shifted my weight around uncomfortably.

"You're name sounds familiar..." she trailed off in thought as she continued to stare at me. I tilted my head in confusion. I've never met Sasha. I have no idea how she would know me. I try to keep a low profile around here. I was going through all the possibilities of her knowing me when she suddenly snapped her fingers, and I jumped startled.

"Thea. You're the girl that Carl mentioned earlier. He seems to have taking a liking to you already. I wouldn't blame him though. You're pretty, and you seem to have your head screwed on pretty straight. Not like the rest of these people" she gushed, muttering the last part. I smiled politely, but all that was going through my head was ways to kill Carl while making it look like an accident.

"Thea!"

Speaking of the little devil. I turned around and see him walking up with the biggest smile on his face.

"You came! I really didn't think you'd show up" he exclaimed. Well, if Sasha hadn't showed up, I would be walking back home right now. I humored him anyway.

"I'm only here because of what you said earlier. I actually wanted to apolog---" I start, but he abruptly cuts me off.

"Thea, if there's one thing I've learned during all of this is this; don't ever be sorry. My dad's old friend taught me that" he said seriously.  His face was stoney, like he was recalling a bad memory, maybe even several. I sighed and bit my lip again.

"Let's have some fun then, yea?" I said, grabbing his arm and pulling him up the porch steps. I shot Sasha a smile before I finish dragging him inside.

     I don't know why I wanted to comfort him. Maybe it was because he was like me. I had no one to tell me that things would get better or say that everything was okay. I knew he had people, but I just wanted to make sure he didn't have to go through what I had.