So, I've been trying to please my mom more so when I took a shower just barely I shaved and now I kind of feel naked. It feels weird. But I was thinking about wearing something more "girly" on Monday to school to make my mom happier or whatever but I just can't bring myself to do it. I also was thinking about growing my hair out too but I can't have that. I just can't. If I have long hair again I think I would end up kinda freaking out or something.
So, I don't know if I mentioned this before but my mom isn't really that supportive. She doesn't really talk about it I guess but the other day we went shopping for clothes for the first day of school and I didn't want to get pants that were really tight like skinny jeans usually are because I'm kinda strange and I like skinny jeans but like looser. It's just more comfortable for me I guess and it doesn't emphasize my hips a whole lot. She wouldn't let me. She made my sisters search through the store to buy curvy pants and it really upset me.
So lately I've been feeling pretty dysphoric and I keep crying myself to sleep pretty much. I really want to talk to Rory but my mom doesn't really like him anymore. I'm not sure why but its been pretty bad and he hasn't been on Skype lately so I haven't talked to him and I can't talk to him at school because he's still at the middle school while I'm at the high school now.
Anyway, I think I'll go now you guys. Comment advise or just comment if you want. Do whatever you want.
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SachbücherI'm just a transboy looking for a way to get my feelings out. If you don't respect or don't like anything lgbt+, mogai, non binary, or queer--please leave. This journal may be helpful for some people who are new to the queer community or who are thi...
