Tainted Redemption

Chapter twenty

Our sleep had run short when the dawn broke over and the light streams through my room's window, not that I minded since we're cuddled close, staring silently at each other for quite some time.

I yawn a little, rubbing on my eyes.

"You're beautiful..." he mumbles dazzled, his hand reaches up, thumb brushing tenderly on my cheek. He said it as a statement, not just a compliment.

My hands falter and I let them lay back on his chest.

Maybe love really blinds you because I'm pretty sure my hair is a tangled mess and laying in an ugly angle, most of the time I look like a racoon in the morning or have panda eyes because of my smudged mascara, or even like Captain Jack Sparrow, but of course I can't pull it off like Depp.

Since I'm tucked near his shoulder I bit down his bicep roughly, he chuckles, the hand on my hip pulls me closer, coping a feel a single time as I let a bite mark on his shoulder, and when I retreat he smiles with his tongue lightly bit on all of the sudden and I think it's because I'm blushing.

I love to see him happy.

Lowering my eyes then roaming back up to assess his face repeatedly, "I love you." I tell him breathlessly with a faint smile curving my lips, he stills, being shocked that I said it so randomly before smiling brighter.

His lips part but I prevent him by pressing my finger pads on his luscious, dark red lips that still look swollen, "I'd rather you say it spontaneously, Zayn." I whisper gently, he's hesitant wanting to say it yet again but I shook my head, "I know that you do..." I reassure him, tracing the scar on his chest when my sight caught it. It's a faint white line that will always be visible. This was one of the biggest evidences that back's up his love for me; he was ready to give his life for mine.

He nods understandingly as I feel his fingers trail to the bullet scabed skin on my hip, having a guilty expression on. He beats himself up about me being shot since he was frightened. I know to be more careful now. And it doesn't hurt that much, only a slight sting when I move too abruptly.

"Why did you get this?" he asked, taking my pink hair strand between his index and middle finger, eyes inspecting it for a little.

"It was a bolder pink but faded to this... I always wanted to change my hair in a drastic colour but didn't have the guts, so this was the alternative..." I explain, "You don't like it?" I question curiously.

"No, no. I do... it goes perfectly with your pale skin and blue eyes, I just," he shrugged, his eyes find mine, "During the time I wasn't here you've coped with small changes." he explained.

"Does that upset you?"

"Time was wasted when we were apart."

"No, we needed that. Also, you have changed as well." I state, "Your hair," I smiled when he grimaced a bit, maybe he was mocked by his mob mates about, but he pulls it off, "I really like it. And there's more tattoos on your body." I mumble gently.

"You got new ink too." he says and just then his hand is on my shoulder, feeling the long dried tattoo.

I don't utter a word, my hands rest on his broad shoulders almost unwittingly but instinctively, they feel different, more defined and he's a bit bulkier. It looked like he's been working out.

I notice that I've been staring and feeling him up for quite a while now, running my french dipped nails on his sturdy skin, I flushed red stopping my hands but when I look at him he doesn't seem cocky about it, he doesn't tease me, no he just look tormented with his eyes staring deeply to mine.

I would want to know what he's thinking about that got him so sad.

"Zayn.." I whispered, he averted his eyes around then back to me, I part my lips but he leaned his head closer to mine messing with the part of my brain which is for speaking so the words get stuck in my throat.