The First Fall

Chapter 25

The marriage was a very private and lovely affair attended by close family and friends. Rene looked beautiful in her wedding gown and Alex was the epitome of male perfection. They both were the picture perfect couple and both had only eyes for each other. J T attracted the attention of the women folk present in his best man attire which for some reason didn’t sit well with Rhea. I saw him winking at her more than once and the look they both shared discreetly was inflammable. There was something of the romantic nature going on there and even though they both were keeping it to themselves I could feel it and I promised myself to get to the bottom of it very soon.

Alex and Rene were planning to go on their honeymoon in two days and frankly speaking I was feeling a little bit nervous. This was the first time both of them will be away from me after I first came to stay with them and I shared a special kind of bond with them especially with  Alex. He took care of me like a brother and a father at times and I can’t even compare his care with that of my own parents because in reality he has done much more than they ever could do for me when I lived with them.

They gave me good education, instilled in me values and provided me with everything which they felt was good for me but they never asked for my opinions or stood up for me when I needed their love and support. They never attended any of my PTA meetings nor did they tried to do anything about my lack of self-confidence. The only thing they were interested in were my scores and getting good marks or making sure that I tried my best to acquire them. They were not even concerned about the lack of friends in my life back then. It seemed like we were living in our own worlds dealing with our own issues. I don’t hate them but nor do I want to spend the rest of my life with them. We kept in touch with phone calls and e mails but that was it.

I wasn’t even aware of the day fading away and soon found myself in the hotel lobby for the reception. I hated crowds and this was a high profile one where my social worth was going to be weighed and analyzed. I was going through the torture only for Alex and Rene.

I gave myself the pep talk, took in deep breaths to stabilize my confidence which was not much and took the first step to face the music. My legs became weak and my palms started sweating and I had to drag in deep breaths but the panic within me was growing like darkness. I was about to turn around planning to hide somewhere or to run back to the house with my tail between my legs when someone caught my wrist.

I gasped and turned to find J T standing before me looking at me with concern.

“Are you okay Nina? Alex told me to look for you and he also mentioned this difficulty of yours in facing a crowd.”

“Thank God J T. I was about to run back when you stopped me.”

He gave me a hug and I sagged into him. He took my sweaty palms in his and said “Look at me dear, no one here is going to give you a hard time. I promise you that. But before facing these people you should gather yourself. Be the sister Alex is proud of, be the sister and friend whom I respect very much and be the strong friend Rhea and Jenny says you are and be my Roy’s Nina.”

I nodded my head and looked up at his face. He was right; I can’t always hide like this. At some point in my life I will have to stand up for myself, will have to face a lot of difficult situations and if I can’t even face this function then how was I going to face those obstacles which life haad in  reserve for me?

I gave a weak smile and stood straight. He got the message that I was trying to gather myself and waited patiently by my side. When he felt that I was ready he gently pushed me in the direction from which he came from and kept his hands on my shoulders. When I got the first glimpse of the gathering I gripped JT’s arms in a solid grip and let him drag me into the sea of people.