The Devil Wears Girl Jeans [BEING EDITED]

The Devil Wears Girl Jeans (Chapter 15)

It was the night before the Monster Mash, and all through the costume store, not a creature was stirring, except for a disgruntled Lacey, an excited Aubrey, and me. There was, of course, a cashier, who was currently slumped over his issue of Guns and Ammo, while a song about walking a thousand miles just to see someone blared in the background.

“Okay, what do you guys think of this one?” Lacey asked, strutting out of the changing room in what was hardly a legal amount of clothes, even for Halloween.

“I don't even understand what you're supposed to be.” I told her, and she sighed, before turning around and marching back into the cubicle, where I could see the stack of discarded costumes that had taken up the last hour and a half of my day. For something that you only wore for one night a year (two, in our case), she was a bit too concerned about finding the perfect one.

However, considering we'd waited until just now to buy our costumes, the selection was pretty grim. Unless you wanted to be a slutty Snow White, because then you'd be good to go. But for people who preferred not to walk around in negative four weather in nothing but a few scraps of cheap fabric, it kind of sucked.

“Is this perfect or what?” Aubrey asked, stumbling out of the changing room beside Lacey, in ridiculous heels and a form fitting black dress that flowed to her ankles. She looked stunning, as always, a fact that was almost annoying sometimes.

“I uh....Yeah, it looks fine.” I told her, not entirely sure what she was aiming for, but deciding I really didn't care enough to ask. She could've made even the worst of the bargain bin costumes look good, and I sighed. Everything I'd tried on so far either involved being under 5”9, or having boobs, neither of which I was the proud owner of. Basically, I had the body of a 12 year old boy, which a majority of these costumes weren't exactly made to fit.

Turning back to where I was digging through the pile of discarded costumes that none of the employees had bothered to put away, I continued digging through the plastic packages until finally I spotted something that wasn't lingerie, nor was it one of the numerous Snow White costumes. I yanked at a piece of red fabric until eventually I loosened it from the surrounding barricade of costumes, which tumbled down to fill the previously occupied space.

When I looked down at the costume in my hands, I could've thanked the Halloween Fairy, or the God of Costumes, or whoever was in charge of that kind of stuff, because I knew I'd found the ideal costume. I, Hartley Wolf, was going to be a lobster.

“You guuuuuys!” I wailed in excitement. “I found my costume!”

Aubrey poked her head out from behind a rack of sunglasses, and grinned, motioning for me to go put it on. I did as she said, sliding my legs into the little lobstery leg holes, and trying to wrestle my arms into the claws.

Just as I managed to slide my right arm in, the Batman theme song began to blare out of my iPhones speakers. I let out a cry of frustration, and some how managed to awkwardly hunch over just enough to snag it out of the back pocket of my jeans, not an easy task.

Quinn Carr would like to Facetime my phone informed me, and I begrudgingly pressed accept.