Never Enough

twelve.

Mia.

"Tell me what happened please" Ethan begged and rubbed my back. I just shook my head 'no' for the hundredth time and placed both of my hands over my face.

I had stopped crying but I needed to talk to Grayson and figure out what just happened. I knew that wouldn't be such a good idea though; at least not right now.

"Why can't you tell me? Did Grayson do something?"

I stayed quiet looked down at my hands, tugging on my fingers.

"Did Grayson do something to you?" his tone was laced with concern. I continued to stay quiet and the chair to my right that Ethan was sitting on, creaked signaling that he stood up. The sliding door shut behind me and I watched Ethan through the glass walk down the hall to Grayson's room.

Great.

Grayson.

After Mia had left the room I sat there cursing at myself and punching my wall. My knuckles started to bleed own to the top of my wrist but I could care less.

Why did I have to be such a dumb ass and kiss her? I almost couldn't control myself earlier when I had her pinned against the car, but I knew she wasn't in the right mind set then. She was emotionally a wreck and I didn't want to take advantage of her weakened self.

The entire car ride I repeated in my head 'don't do anything stupid. don't touch her' over and over to remind myself that it was a horrible idea.

When we got inside and I caught her staring at my lips, I couldn't control it anymore. I needed her more than anything.

Her lips felt so good on mine. The way she bit onto my bottom lip and tugged every few seconds made every inch of my body ignite. I found myself digging my hips into her and massaging my hands on her waist as she tugged on the back hair on the back of my head while moaning into the kiss.

At some point during out kiss, something snapped inside me and my conscious broke through to me.

What are you doing

I snapped back into reality and I stood off the bed in a hurry.

All I could think was I ruined her.

I couldn't let myself lead her on anymore. I mean, it was clear to her and I that there was definitely chemistry between us, and we both knew what we wanted, but she doesn't really want someone like me. I'm horrible at controlling my temper, and I'm afraid of hurting her. I'm afraid that one day I'd do something so bad and shed hate me for it.

As much I loved that kiss, it could never happen again. I told myself that I would do whatever it takes to protect her, even from me. I'm not good for her, and I would hate myself if I hurt her just like I hurt... nevermind.

Which I'm sure I just did, fuck.

My thoughts were interrupted when my door slammed open and Ethan walked in.

Ethan.

I slammed open Gray's door and walked towards him.

"What did you do to Mia" I growled at him.

His eyes were wide and red and his hair was pushed in a different directions.  

I scrunched my eyebrows as my eyes connected with the huge hole in the wall and the blood on his hand.

"Bro... what happened?" I said calmer this time and sat next to him on the floor.