Bad Desire: New Beginnings - Fast Forward

Chapter 41

Jess and Jack were sat off to the side of the dance floor with the rest of the Lawrence's and also Sophie's family. They were all happily catching up and talking about how things were going when the annoying presence of Ashley began making her way over.

"Hey! Oh my god it's been such a long time. Louise!" Ashley literally pounced on Jack's mum with the biggest hug.

Louise didn't know what to say at first and it was clear it took her a moment to figure out who this crazy woman was.

"Oh hi, sweetie!" She finally said hugging her back. "How are you?"

"Great! It's so good to all be back together like this, it feels like Christmas! They were the best times."

Jess' head instantly turned away from Ashley as she focused her gaze on Jack, who was already looking at her. He had been waiting for her to turn around with that exact expression of shock and uncertainty.

"She spent one Christmas with us. She's over exaggerating." Jack quickly tried to reassure her as he squeezed her hands. "She's doing it on purpose to try and rile you up."

It was working, Jess thought as ahe sat there being displayed with the news that this girl had spent Christmas with a family Jess now called her own.

"I thought you two were just like friends with benefits? I didn't think it was serious enough for her to be around your family."

Jess had been trying her hardest to not let Ashley get to her. She knew this girls aim would be to pick at every single thing she could to cause issues and put doubts in Jess' mind and she had been clever to pick Jack's family.

They meant so much to Jess and she viewed them as her own, as a real family was something she never had. Therefore, knowing that Ashley had once been involved with them was not so pleasing to hear.

"We were. Honestly babe, it was just one Christmas and she's making it seem like a bigger deal than it is."

By this point Jack was looking back at Jess intensely as he was trying so hard to get through to her. He could see how much it was getting to her feelings and he didn't want to see it happen.

Ashley liked to exaggerate, especially regarding Jack. She liked to remember a fantasy world where rewind eight or nine years and the pair of them were book happy. However, there never was a relationship for them to be happy in and instead it was just a whole lot of messing around.

"Just ignore her. Shut her annoying mouth out." Jack continued as he reached over to pull Jess closer. "We'll talk about something else."

Jess was watching him sceptically as he ran his tongue over his top lip.

"Like how fucking beautiful you look in that dress."

His eyes zoomed in on the material covering Jess' body that fit tightly over certain areas for obvious emphasis and had Jack gawping over her all night.

He had been making small comments to her when no one was around causing Jess to blush, which was a really rare occurrence and something she didn't like to admit to doing.

"I can't believe you're showing already though." Jack continued as he reached out and laid a hand over Jess' tiny bump, that Jess had purposely not tried to cover up.

They were both too excited over the whole ordeal to be discrete about it and therefore, Jess wasn't afraid to show it off.

"I swear I'm showing earlier and earlier with each pregnancy, so there is no chance of hiding it anymore." Jess laughed as she laid her own hand over Jack's.

Due to her experiencing pregnancy many times before her stomach had stretched which meant every time she fell pregnant again, it would never take long for her body to fall back into the position of pregnancy mode. It meant her bump would show much earlier than a first time pregnant woman and would usually make her look further along than she actually was.

"I'm so ex-" Jack began to speak before Ashley's voice powered over his.

"You're pregnant?!" She threw a hand over her mouth. "It makes sense now!! I thought you had just put on weight."

Neither Jack nor Jess knew what to say for a moment out of shock for what she had just said. Firstly, they were sure she knew and secondly, they knew Ashley had no filter, especially when it came to Jess but she had just taken it a step too far.

"I know it must be difficult as a mum maintaining the weight you once were. Sitting at home with kids all the time can cause it to pile on so I just assumed-"

"Are you taking the piss right now?" Jack suddenly cut Ashley off as he looked at her with pure disgust at what had just left her mouth.

"No, I was just saying." She shrugged her shoulders innocently but her smug smile was unmissable.

"So what if she had put on weight anyway?" Jack opened up his arms.

Pregnancy was one of those miracle experiences that as much as it was incredible, it could also leave a woman feeling extremely insecure. Jess hadn't been immune to that and with her first two pregnancies she had found the changes difficult to process or accept.

However, she had reached a point of acceptance and it was no longer something she let phase her. It was a part of life and with Jack's constant reassurance of how much he loved her new body they way it was, it was difficult to see any negatives in it. He made her feel beyond beautiful and therefore, previous insecurities were non-existent.

"I think it's a huge fucking achievement managing to carry and give birth to four babies, don't you?"

When Jack posed the question to Ashley, she didn't respond. She wasn't quite sure what to say because she hadn't expected Jack to jump on the sudden defence. Her aim had just been to get to Jess but she had also got to Jack in the process.

"She's given me four, soon to be five beautiful children while gaining an insane body, which is even better than her old one."

Jess was unable to look anywhere but Jack at this point as her body filled with warmth and love for everything he was saying. The fact that he was sat there prepared to defend her with everything it took, made her fall for him all over again.

Body shaming was a cruel human action and it could always affect people in two different ways. You could either believe it and let it eat away at you daily, destroying every positive emotion inside of you. Or, you could stand up to it and be proud of who you were, no matter what your insecurities were.

Jess could have very easily let Ashley's words take her right back to that awful feeling she had experienced after her first two pregnancies; that time when she felt at her most vulnerable and insecure. However, with Jack's words and her own self-confidence over what she had got out of the changes, she didn't need to let Ashley's words settle on her mind.

She knew her body had changed, of course it had. It was impossible for her figure to get straight back to what it was in her teen years. However, she didn't despise and reject what it had become and instead appreciated it. It was something she was proud of because she knew if she hadn't allowed the minor changes in herself, she never would have been blessed with the four children she loved more than anything.

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