Break Me One More Time [McLennon]

in which brian is depressed

     Months went by, and things began to get better. Slowly but surely, things were getting better all the time (pun absolutely intended).

     But it was 1967 and August was fast approaching and Paul couldn't even begin to form a plan on how to save Brian. The problem was that Paul still didn't know whether it had been an accidental overdose or if Brian had killed himself. If it was an overdose, he could check on him consistently in the days leading up to when the police were supposed to go in and find him dead. But if Brian had killed himself...Paul didn't know how to save someone who didn't want to be saved.

     He was also concerned with the fact that he'd never changed anything quite this big. Dating John was big, yeah, but that was also kept a secret for the most part. John not falling in love with Yoko was pretty huge but it wasn't a life or death matter. Stuart escaping death was insane but that hadn't been Paul's doing. If Paul saved Brian's life, though...

     "I'm going to save Brian," he told Yoko with a huge smile plastered across his face, looking rather unremovable.

      "You are?" She beamed.

      "Yes!" Paul nodded. "I mean, I've been given a shot at saving John, that's why I'm here, but does that mean I should let everyone else I love die? Hell no."

      "Absolutely, I'm totally with you!" Yoko nodded. "So, how're you going to do it?"

     "I have absolutely no idea whatsoever," Paul said, but he was still smiling.

      Not long after, Barney came for a quick visit and Paul told him the same thing he'd told Yoko — Barney didn't

      "I'm worried," Barney sighed. He was on one of his father infrequent midnight visits. July was coming to an end which gave Paul barely a month to formulate a plan.

      "Me, too," Paul nodded. "I just don't know how I'm going to do it. Where do I even begin?"

     "That's not what I meant, Paulie," Barney shook his head. "I meant I'm worried about the whole saving him thing. I'm not so sure you should go through with it."

     "What? Are you crazy?" Paul looked at him, eyes the size of golf balls. "Barney, he's my friend. If I don't save him, then what's the point of me being here? So, what? I'm only supposed to save John? I'm supposed to sit back  and watch Brian die? What's next? Should I just let George go, too?"

     "All I'm saying is...be careful," Barney said. "Changing the big things...it's dangerous. And especially when we're getting so close to saving John, we have to be careful."

     "We're not close!" Paul shook his head. "It's 1967, for god's sake. I've been here for six years, yeah, but we've got thirteen more to go before Chapman pulls the trigger."

     Barney sighed. "Still.."

     "You know, I've been thinking," Paul said. "Why don't we just kill Mark David Chapman? Wouldn't that make this all so much easier?"

     "Oh, sure," Barney said. "Instead of just keeping John out of New York, out of America if we can, during the time surrounding his death, let's just go kill someone. In fact, let's go right now. How old is Chapman right now? Eleven? Twelve?"

      Paul sighed. "Okay, point taken."

     Barney nodded. "Good. Now, listen. I should tell you to leave Brian alone, hope for the best and pray that maybe you've altered history enough that he won't die, but that's not what I'm going to do. Here's what I am going to do; I'm going to tell you to do what you think best, but promise me you'll be cautious."