90210 (Travi$ Scott)

50• I Just Want To Sleep

• 11:39 a.m •

"This is really good!" I said as I bit into a patty.

"Steezy with the tricks!" He bragged while eating his food.

I chuckled and looked at the TV.

"You ok?" He asked.

"Yeah! Why wouldn't I be?"

"Ever since I came back from the store, you've been acting weird."

"How so?"

"Just awkward silences and it makes me feel some type of way and the way you stare off into space."

"I'm sorry Steez. Didn't mean to make you feel that way."

"Nah, don't apologize. Tell me what's going on."

"Steez." I laughed. "I'm fine!"

._.

.-. "What? Don't look at me like that."

"I'm not going to stop bothering you until you tell me."

I put my plate on the table and took a deep breath. "You promise not to tell anyone?"

"Of course. You can tell me anything and I'll keep it confidential."

"So when you left, Jacuqes called."

"Alright."

"Short story short, he blackmailed me."

"Into doing what?"

"Being his girlfriend. Somehow he knows what Jesse and I did and he'll leak everything if I don't do what he says."

"The fuck? He can go to jail for that!"

"I know it!"

"Who cares!? At least you get some dick."

"No Steez! That's so embarrassing! I don't want to deal with the awkwardness."

"Someone needs to know." He said.

"No! I beg you not to say anything!"

"Fine. If that makes you happy."

I could feel how disappointed he was.

"I'm so mad at you." He said.

"Why?!" I exhaled and felt a rush of frustration and sadness. "Why are you mad at me?"

"You're not telling anyone-"

"Because you're the only one I can trust!" I croaked. "You're the one I can really go to without feeling judged or feel bad."

I wiped my hands off on a napkin and held my tears in. His eyes softened and he had a I'm sorry look plastered on his face.

"I thank god for bringing you into my life." Tears poured out of my eyes. "And I'm sorry for making you mad."

"Sometimes I keep everything inside because I don't want to put my problems on anyone and I don't know how to deal with it. I can't help but feel like shit whenever I talk to anyone about a problem I'm facing. It makes me feel so bad! I feel like the one that should be helping whenever there's something wrong with someone and I've felt like this for the longest. I'm here for everyone but no one is here for me...and that's just how I feel."

We were both quiet and could only hear the TV and faint sound of cars outside.

"Another one of those awkward silences..." I said.

Steez covered his face with his hands. "I never knew you felt that way. I apologize. Didn't know how much I meant to you. We both don't how much we mean to each other and I find that pretty sad. We should work on it."

I looked down at my lap, he sat next to me and held me. I put my head on his shoulder.

"I just want to sleep." I said in a raspy voice.

"Go ahead. I'll be right here. Do you need or want anything?"

"Water?"

"Alright watch out." I took my head off of him and he gave me a water bottle.

"Thank you." He sat back down and I laid my head on his shoulder.

I slowly drifted off to sleep. Steez's breathing and the light sounds of the world put me out.