Broken Beyond Repair

Chapter Ten

~:Chapter Ten:~

Half of me is missing, no, more than half. Knowing that my whole life, was gone... It's extremely hard.

It's been five days, an excruciating five days for me, since the news about Sara's passing. Every night I would cry myself to sleep, well day and night you could say. Every day I would barely eat, and Harry didn't check up on me, until today.

The flat is a mess, dirty dishes in the sink, dirty clothes sprawled everywhere. And I didn't look any more appealing. My cheeks are stained with tears, eyes swollen and red. My eyes glossy, and heart broken. Hair, is a tangled mess, no brushing shown. I haven't showered either.

It has finally kicked in, Sara is gone. Never to come back and tell jokes to me, or talk about her day. Just the thought made tears fall.

I lost everything.

My family, my best friend, my dog, everybody.

And I could do nothing about it. I cry a little more.

The sound of a knock on the door made me sit up straight, I don't recall inviting anyone, but then again I don't know anyone.

Someone walked in the door, the sound of boots on the hard wood floor frightened me. It is too early for Josh to come home-Josh!

I quickly bolt out my bedroom door, "Josh I can explain!" I say. Only it wasn't Josh at all. Standing in front of me is Harry.

His hair isn't in its usual quiff, just messy curls laid upon his head, shocked features showing.

The thought of Sara tugs at my heart and I feel sic. I run into the bathroom and puke up the little portion I ate today.

Harry was by my side in seconds, "Joyce are you okay? What's wrong?" He asks noticing my swollen eyes, and sad face. My features are skinnier than usual, cheekbones more prominent.

I say nothing, I'm too destroyed to speak.

~:HARRYS POV:~

I'm stunned at the broken girl sitting before me, what happened to her playful eyes? I knew something was wrong with Joyce from the start, but she wasn't this... Shattered.

"You can't fix me now," Joyce just says with unreadable eyes, and an empty voice.

"What? Joyce you're scaring me." I say, kneeling in front of her.

Joyce only continues, "I mean, before it was possible. But now, it's too late. I'm gone."

I'm at lost for words, "Joyce- I-I don't get what you mean."

Joyce's weak hand reached out with something crumpled in it, paper.

I take it questioningly, looking at Joyce, puzzled. Joyce looks so...dead. Her eyes are a worn out gray, not the familiar blue I am used to.

I read the note without a word, and my mouth turned agape. Was Sara her sister? I wondered.

"My best friend, is dead." Joyce states lifelessly, slowly grabbing the paper back.

"Joyce.. I'm so sorry." I say sincerely, feeling her pain.

"Don't pity me." Joyce commands deadly.

"Darling, I'm here for you, you know?" I say. A panicked look shot through Joyce's face, but she replaced it with irritation.

~:JOYCE'S POV:~

It sounds so much like what Sara would say, and I could've sworn I saw Sara standing next to Harry, maybe I'm going insane.

"Don't call me that." I spit, looking at Harry straight in the eye.

I want to move away, but I'm so exhausted. So all I do is sit on the tiled floor, against the wall directly in front of Harry.

Physical and emotional pain made my bones ache, a longing, like the day when my parents kicked me out. Only, this pain was much worse. It wouldn't lessen, just dug it's way through my heart like a spear.

Is this what dying feels like? I am surely dying on the inside.

Harry leans forward slowly, the action frightens me. I try backing up further into the wall, but remain in my position. He gently embraces me with a compassionate hug. Telling me how sorry he is for my loss, in actions.

"I know it feels like your world is ending, but your heart can use a little mending." Harry speaks softly, rubbing soothing circles into my back.

"Maybe I can mend you, darling," he says delicately, trying not to push it. I choke when he calls me darling, but didn't mention it.

"It hurts Harry." I admit quietly.

In all honesty, it did hurt. It hurt a lot for me. I've never felt anything quite like this. I know that I would never be the same, I would never work properly. I'll just be like a broken record. But Harry is willing to except that.

"C'mon love," Harry coaxes rising to his feet offering a hand.

Carefully, I accept his hand, and stand up, wobbling as if I haven't been walking in days. Well you can say I haven't, usually I would stay in bed trying to catch the sleep insomnia stole away from me.

Harry's hand tightens on mine. "Harry I can walk by myself just fine," I insist but he keeps his hold on my hand.

"You need to get out of this flat," Harry grins looking down at me with caring eyes.

I smile at that, Harry was never too serious, he would crack a smile when the moments got too serious and I admire that.

"I'd love that."

______________________________________________

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OH MY GOD

STORY OF MY LIFE IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL CREATION IVE EVER HEARD.

HOLY FUCK.

As soon as I came home from school I listened to it, and when done I ran around the house like a friken idiot. I think I frightened my parents o.o (I wrote this the day Story Of My Life came out .-.)

UGHHH IT'S SO GOOD. WOW MAN .

THEY SMASHED IT BRO.

Anyways, stay strong beauts ily.

~:Grace:~