Trust Issues h.s.

Chapter 5

Melanie Reed:

I decided it would be best to eat in my dorm. Seeing as though I still couldn't find my wallet, I was forced to use my credit card which was stored away elsewhere so that I wouldn't be tempted to use it. I honestly can't think of where my wallet could be, but I'm sure it will turn up somewhere.

It is now 4:50. Lily texted me, letting me know that she and Hunter would be going out for dinner. She didn't ask me to join them like she normally does, but she did offer to bring me back food. I'm assuming that they just want to be alone. I sure want to be alone besides I don't feel like going out today.

My design class was pretty interesting. I love the professor. She is so laid back yet strict at the same time. She generally doesn't care much about the rules and such as long as we do what we are supposed to and don't break anything. Well she said, and I quote, 'I couldn't care less if you guys break any of this shit equipment. You'll just have to pay for the damages, and then we'll end up with new equipment. So really, I encourage you to do so, unless you don't have the money to pay for the damages because the equipment we have now may be shit but it sure didn't cost a penny..." And then she went on to talk about the things we would do in the class. I have to say though, she is a total hipster. Not that there's anything bad about that because half of the time, well most of the time, so am I. Well I like to think that I am.

We ended class at least 30 minutes early, but it was like I was in class for the entire time that we were scheduled to be in there. She too pulled me to the side and to talk to me about my artistic talents and about how she would love to see my work. She also said something about having talked to the art department chairmen and to Jason about my work. Honestly if I hear something like that again I will scream on the spot. There is nothing at all exciting about my art work. I can't even get anything into an amateur art magazine or gallery so why do they keep going on about all of this shit. I don't get it but whatever; I guess they'll get over it by the end of the week. Well I'm not exactly sure that they will but they better.

I have spent most of my free time trying to find the best way to organize all of my art supplies into the limited amount of space that consists of my half of the dorm room. I literally have no idea how I'm going to organize any of it into this small space. I'm so used to having all the space I want in my art studio back home, which I already miss and it hasn't even been a week yet. I went home on Saturday night to see my studio and just be in there. It was really late that I'm pretty sure nobody in the entire neighborhood noticed my presence, besides Finley. I stayed there for a good 5 hours; this is why I stayed up all night. I was so into my painting that I hadn't even noticed the time. I didn't even have enough time to finish it, so I literally cannot wait to go back and do that.

I know I have full access to the art studios that the school has but it doesn't feel right. I can't work in there. Well not comfortably at least. I tried to work in there on Friday, but when I couldn't. I decided it would be best to work in my dorm room, and only use the studios when I couldn't go home, or whatever I'm working on is too big or messy to do in the dorm. Sadly, that may be happening a lot.

I think one of the biggest reasons that I don't feel comfortable working in the school's art studios is because there is always at least one other person in there. And I personally don't like that. I do not like to work with other people around. I can't stand the idea of someone watching me while I work which is why I was so surprised that I was able to work while Harry was constantly staring. He would only momentarily look away but it was almost as if he would even do that.

As much as I try, I always seem to find myself going back to the same thought. Harry.

I really don't understand why he keeps finding a way back into my thoughts, I honestly don't. I need to not think of him. I need to concentrate on organizing my things and possibly doing some work, which reminds me I need to speak to Jacob about when I will be available to work. I told him that I would have my work schedule ready for him by this weekend after seeing the work load I would have from my classes.