A Different Way[Louis Tomlinson]

Chapter Fourty-Two

Someone bursts through the door and I'm jolted awake.

"Amber! Amber!"

It's Marlene.

"That little fucking asshole!" I'm guessing she's talking about Melody.

It's only then I realise Louis' not anywhere in the room.

"Amber, can you hear me?" Marlene sets a hand on my shoulder, and I turn my head towards her.

"It's Louis, isn't it." I whisper.

She just nods.

Ever so slightly.

****

Darkness. Thats all it is. And coldness. Dark and cold.

My eyes adjust to the totally darkness of the room, and I clutch my arms shivering. Why is it so goddamned cold in here? I pull the sheets farther up my body, but it doesn't help much.

I still have the sickening feeling in my stomach from my dream, and I can't shake the feeling that somethings not right in here.

How was I so stupid? It was obvious, he wasn't there. He wasn't in the bed next to me. I slowly set my hand down in the rumpled sheets. They're cold. Where'd he go?

I stand up shakily, and gaze around the dim room. I can't see anything. I decide on stumbling my way to the door, but stop when I hear a rustle behind me.

I turn on my heel, my insides lurching. He's sitting on the windowsill, his legs curled up against his chest. He hangs his head against the window, his breath slowly fogging up the cold window with each puff of air.

He's sleeping, just got up at some point and ended up falling back asleep. It's completely fine. I keep telling myself. I step back towards the bed, my legs shaking.

"Amber." Louis' voice echoes off the foggy window, and I can see his face in the reflection, me standing behind him.

"Amber come here." He says when I don't reply. I nod, shuffling around the bed and over to him.

He stares down at the streets below.

He wont look up at me, so I stand on my tippy-toes to look over him and out the window.

I wish I hadn't.

I gasp, throwing my hand over my mouth and stumbling backwards and falling onto the bed.

Three police cars and an ambulance's lights flash red and blue below us.

I begin to shake harder, but not from the freezing room.

"What... what's going on?" I question, my voice wavering more than I'd like.

"Melody."

His hot breath fogs up the rest of the window.

****

I sit in the uncomfortable green chair, my head in my hands, elbows on my knees. My foot bounces up and down, causing my whole body to shake.

We've been sitting in the huge hospital's waiting room for what seems like forever.

Waiting to see if they found her too late.

Louis had explained to me that they had found her sprawled on the bathroom floor in her hotel room. Her eyes, the police said, had been red and puffy, and that she held a crumpled piece of paper in her hands.

They wouln't let us read the paper.

Not just yet.

"Only if..." One police man had said, trailing off.

"Only if she doesn't get back up." Louis finished his sentence for him.

That had been in the darkest hours of the night, the moon shining about the flashing lights, glinting off the tears rolling down all of our faces.

We all had said we hated her.

We hadn't lied, we all hated her.

But you still cry when you find someone half dead on the tile in a bathroom.

Because you can't bear to think it could have been you; your fault she might be all dead now.

And thats exactly what I'm thinking, as we all sit there in that hideous green room at five in the morning, hoping the girl we all hated isn't dying back there on a hospital bed.

Finally, at exactly 6:12, had been staring at the clock for and hour, a doctor shuffles in, checking her clipboard. We all stiffen, hoping to get called, and yet somehow hoping not to.

"Uhm... Melody Shaune?" She questions, looking up. My shoulders slump as Louis and I slowly stand up, along with the rest of us. She gives a curt smile and leads us back down the glossy white hallway.

136 doors later, she stops. The door is closed, and before she even opens her mouth, I can feel the absence in the air. I burst out crying even harder than before, and I burry my head in my hands.

"It's okay, deary, she's in a better..."

"No, don't you dare say that to me." I gag at her. She most definitely is not in a better place.

"We have to talk." Is all she says as she turns and opens the door. Louis wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me inside.

She's laid on the bed, completely and utterly still. I don't know why but it breaks me even more. I crumple in Louis' arms. I didn't even like her, why am I so messed up about this?

"I'm sorry to say, but it was a suicide. Swallowed a thing of pills. Funny thing is, we don't even know how she got the pills in the first place." The lady sighs, watching our facial expressions.

"What do you mean, you don't even know how she got them?" Liam is the most unfazed by this whole situation. But I'm still the only one crying.

The lady holds up an empty pill container, and says, "I do believe this belongs to, uhm, you, Amber." She turns the bottle between her fingers, flashing the barcode and label, marked with my name.

I swear, the whole world gasped.

"How'd... but how..." I mumble, completely confused.

"So, it is yours?" The lady sighs.

"Yeah... but I swear I didn't do anything... I don't even know how she got those..." I stutter, staring at the empty bottle, seeing Melody's lifeless body in an orange haze through it.

"I know..." Cali whispers from behind Zayn.

We all turn to her, and she steps around him, her head hung.

"I saw her grab something out of your suitcase, Amber. She wouldn't tell me what it was she took. And I was too afraid to tell you..." She glances up from the floor only once, to meet my eyes for merely three seconds tops.

"I'm sorry... I should have said something, it's my fault." She begins to sob, and Zayn takes her in his arms, stroking her hair.

"No deary, it's not your fault. Not at all." The lady writes something on her clipboard and then presses a button on the wall.

"They're coming to take her. Say goodbye if you'd like." She steps back, next to the door. We all glance around at each other, before our eyes rest on Melody.

Sorry this sucked and uhm what the heck happened.

5.26.14