I'd be dead with out you.

Chaper 12

I woke up to an empty house. It was passed four so I guess Evan went out with friends or something. I had text messages but none of them were from Alan though one caught my eye.

"We need to hang. Where have you been~ J&S"

I almost hyperventilated when I saw the signature. I knew I should have got my number changed. I threw the phone down on the couch. It was too late to call Alan because his show started in an hour and I didn't want to worry him. Instead of dwelling I went into the kitchen to make myself some tea. We didn't have much for food but I still found a salad and some star fruit. The boys didn't even know it existed until I brought some home from the store one day. It was now Evan and Alan's favorite fruit to munch on. I took a sip of tea and immediately felt relaxed. I decided to just go upstairs and do some light reading or take a bath. As I got into the room my eye was caught by a piece of notebook paper. I put my tea down on the mahogany dresser and picked up the note, which was attached to a dvd case.

"Angel:

Close your eyes and I'll kiss you
Tomorrow I'll miss you
Remember I'll always be true
And then while I'm away
I'll write home every day
And I'll send all my loving to you

I'll pretend that I'm kissing
The lips I am missing
And hope that my dreams will come true
And then while I'm away
I'll write home every day
And I'll send all my loving to you

All my loving I will send to you
All my loving, darling I'll be true

Close your eyes and I'll kiss you
Tomorrow I'll miss you
Remember I'll always be true
And then while I'm away
I'll write home every day
And I'll send all my loving to you

All my loving I will send to you
All my loving, darling I'll be true
All my loving, all my loving ooh
All my loving I will send to you.

Take a deep breath as I promise you this. I hope you aren't stressing too much but if somethings bugging you pop this in the DVD player and just remember, All my Lovin, I am sending to you,- ALAN"

I don't know how he managed to give me butterflies still but it's obvious he cares. Across the universe was taped to the note and he knew it was my favorite movie. I heard the front door open and slam.

"Honey I'm home!" Evan called up the stairs. I laughed and walked out to greet her.

"You've been crying are you alright?" She asked while setting her stuff down.

"Yeah Alan just left a surprise for me that I wasn't expecting is all. Wanna go grab some dinner?" I asked her.

"Acutally I ate at work," she informed me. I smiled and shrugged.

"cool maybe some other time. so um since the boys are gone I think this is the best time to fit some suprises into the wedding," I said flopping down on the couch with her. A look of apprehension came over her and she went pale. I was really into helping her with this and it seemed she was scared.

"um... Angel?" she asked while looking down. I knew what was coming and I wasn't about to let it happen.

"yeah?" I said not to let her know I knew about her stupidity.

"I think I wanna move the wedding back," she said.

"What!? no no no no no why?" I whined which caught her attention.

"I feel like I'm making a mistake and rushing into this, I just want more time to be in a better place in life you know, like go back to school and stuff," She said obviously trying to convince me this was a good thing.

"I support that but you're also engaged to the love of your life and getting married in six months," I said flatly not letting my argument go.

"I love him but- ugh- everything feels wrong!" she said. I put a reassuring hand on her shoulder but it was obvious it wasn't helping.

"Have you talked to him about this?" I asked realizing that he was probably in the dark about how she was feeling.

"no," she muttered not moving from her position.

"why not? if he is going to be your life partner you should at least talk to him more. I think you are stuck between trying to be already grown up and a transitioning teenager. you have a will to be independent an support yourself yet you are entering a relationship with someone which is keeping you from being independent," I pointed out finally seeing her side of this.

"I think you are right but what should I do about this then?" she asked me in a tone of desperation. If this was me I would call him right now and tell him everything bothering me but I knew evan wasn't about to do that.

"Honey.. accept that you are getting married in six months and I am planning your wedding for you until you get this mess figured out," I said hopping up and taking my planning book upstairs.

"Angel!" she yelled angerly but I wasn't about to just give up. This was as important to me as it was to Austin. I heard burlesque come on downstairs and knew she would call Austin soon. I scrolled thorough my phone and found Alans contact and called him.

"Hey baby," He said happily on the other end.

"Hi babe. I got your little message. Thank you," I said smiling as if he were actually here.

"No problem! How was your day anyway?" He asked me.

"Um good I slept most of the day and then got a text from Julie that worried me," I said just spilling out heat stressed me out.

"What did it say?" He asked sounding pensive.

"Um just that we need to hang and she asked where I was. I didn't answer it and honestly I want my number changed," I told Alan while flopping on the bed.

"Yeah I want it changed too. We can take care of that when I get back. Austin's on the phone with Evan and he looks upset. What's going on?" Alan asked throwing a curveball.

"She wants to push the wedding back," I told him. A long sigh escaped his lips.

"Maybe it's for the best. She's just not ready and we all know it. Just don't push her and she may make a different decision," Alan said as if he knew what I was doing.

"Okay," I said flatly.

"Babe it's not our decision to make. In fact if we made it for them it would just upset them more," he said soothingly.

"Okay I see the point," I said happily. We continued to talk about how his show went and how the fans reacted to an acoustic of second and Sebring. We spent a good two hours on the phone and finally I decided he needed his sleep.

"Goodnight baby," he said.
"Night my prince," I said and hung up. It was really late and as much as I wanted to go check on Evan I took a shower instead and crawled into bed. Avery had come over and as much as I loved her I just didn't have the strength to stay up.