A Voice Unheard - Part II: Poetry

Angel

I don't know how I got here, or how long it will last,

But I absolutely love the days that have just passed,

So much good has happened, so many people touching my soul,

Filling me to the brim, making me feel whole,

I am used to being nothing to nobody,

But lately something has changed so beautifully.

It goes back to a promise I made myself all those years ago while in pain,

That I would never again feel this and all my love and efforts would not go in vain,

I promised myself that I too would have memories to keep and remember,

And that being a misfit would not go on forever,

In many ways, I got what I wanted, I got the freedom I sought,

Through my journey since that vow, for so much I have fought.

It was not a fight for recognition or praise, but a fight for existence,

So many people came, saw and left me for nothing; life started to lose its sense,

Through all that I've come to a place of peace, a place that is my own,

So much pain I went through, so much I have grown,

There were people I had to let go of in order to hold on to myself,

It was a rocky journey, so many tears I wept.

However much time I wasted on the wrong people, life gave me a second chance,

It was more than I deserved but anyway I took it wholeheartedly and began a new dance,

Slowly but surely, I have found where I belong after learning who I am,

I no longer interact with people who's lives represent excuses and shams,

People still jeer and mock, and that will always be the same,

But now, for once in my life, I have a name!

There are others who's respect, love and admiration I have,

And for that I am truly blessed and indeed glad,

The rest all I cannot please, neither do I hope to,

I am me; I have nothing to lose,

There have been people who have silently pretended to understand and be fair,

I have walked away from them all, without a care.

Its quite a change for me not to care about the world and their thoughts,

Now the way I see it, they can all go rot,

I am a big crier, but now I cry only happy tears,

Slowly I can feel it as there is a calming of my fears,

What I have been through, no one can understand,

My life has never been my own, its always been in some other's hands.

I've been through hell and back in every way,

With no help from anyone, not a kind word did anyone say,

So much guilt and blame thrown at me,

Many many times life has left me to bleed,

I've died so many times in the hell that was my life,

But with as much dignity I worked through that strife.

I did it, without any excuses, without any help or empathy,

Truth be told I got the exact opposite: I got nothing but indifference and apathy,

To many I may be a scar on society or family or humans itself,

But to the ones who love me I am best as myself,

And there are many who love me no matter what I am or how I look,

It is to those people that I will be as honest as an open book.

To those of you who love me enough to take an interest in my life and me,

You will get the same interest and love unconditionally,

In my life I have only ever wanted to belong to someone or fit in somewhere,

But after everything that I have been through I no longer care,

So for the few who care and who show me their love,

To you all, I will be your guardian loving angel from above.