What Should Have Been

Part 41

"Connie? Connie?" "Hmm..." She woke up, slightly startled as she looked around the room before her eyes focused on Elliot. "Where am I?" "You're in the office Connie." She looked about the dark room before sitting up properly. "Sam?" Suddenly everything from the last 24 hours flooded back.

Without waiting for any confirmation from Elliot, she got up rushing from the office towards his room. As she walked along the corridor she couldn't hear Elliot following her at all. She only stopped when she reached the windows, his eyes still closed and his position still the same. Why had she been so stupid as to believe he'd woken yet.

Regardless she let herself inside, the door closing quietly behind her but it was enough to disrupt him. "Con?" Her eyes darted up seeing him shift ever so slightly in the bed. "Sam..." She moved to his bedside looking to him as he tried pushing himself up the bed. "No, don't move." "Con it's fine, I've been awake a few hours and before you kill Elliot I told him not to wake you."

She closed her eyes before feeling his hand take hold of hers. "I love you, I promised I'd keep fighting this for you... For Grace." Connie forced a smile letting go of his hand to sit in the chair beside him, pulling it up to his bed. "You better, I'll never forgive you otherwise." He watched her just happy to be able to look at her again.

Sam laughed gently causing Connie to frown shaking her head. "Who'd have thought... Connie Beauchamp crying over one of her registrars-" "Shut up Sam." She couldn't help but smile at his light-hearted behaviour. "Besides you're not just a registrar-" "No?" "No." He took hold of her hand once again watching her. "I thought I was going to lose you before showing you how much you really meant to me..."

Connie sat forwards on the edge of her chair as she looked to him. "I don't want to die Connie-" "Hey, don't talk like that... You're not going to die, at least you won't if you don't piss me off." He laughed a little as she caressed his cheek gently. "Don't think like that, please." He forced a smile before she stood leaning down and meeting his lips carefully. Sam placed a hand to her back before she parted from him.

All her words from earlier suddenly came back to her but she tried not to show her panic. "Sam?" "Mmm..." She swallowed past the lump in her throat before sitting down in the chair. "If I said, I hadn't been completely honest with you would you hate me?" "I could never hate you Connie... Not even if I tried, and believe me I have tried." She smirked letting him get the better of her before looking down to the floor.

"She's mine isn't she?" Connie closed her eyes tightly wishing she could be anywhere but here having this conversation. Sam sat there, watching her reluctance to answer or look at him. In his heart he had known, from the moment he first saw her there was something almost familiar about her. As though he had seen her before and the way he felt, it wasn't something you just found over night. It had just taken some time to piece everything together, and a near death experience to put things into perspective. "You heard me earlier?"

"No... I think I already knew, just didn't want to admit I'd missed out on my baby's life I guess." Connie lifted her eyes back to him realising her hand was still encased in his. "You're not angry with me-" "Connie you raised your little girl alone, for three years... How could I hate you for that when it was me who left?" Her eyes widened a little as Sam sat himself up in the bed.

"This isn't your fault though, I lied to you... I didn't tell you about her and now she doesn't even know her father-" "Does it matter? I'm here now aren't I... I missed too much to miss anything more Connie, with both of you." He watched the tears roll down her cheeks before things seemed to really sink in with him. "I have... We have a daughter..."

Connie watched as he shook his head covering his face momentarily with his hands. "I have a beautiful little girl Con, I..." She watched him overcome with feelings and thoughts, not sure if this blissful situation would last. "Promise me something?" Sam looked to her nodding. "No matter how bitter our relationship may get, never take it out on her. She never wanted any of this, she just wanted her Daddy and I couldn't give her that... Now she has it, I don't want her to lose it again."

Sam laughed shaking his head. "What?" "You... You really don't see it do you? I knew all along that little girl was mine and I never once asked you. It's been seven months and neither of us wanted to break the moment by saying it. Do you really think it's all going to suddenly change? You and Grace, you're my family and they tend to stick together through everything... That's exactly what I intend on doing if you'll take me."

Connie smirked leaning back in the chair. "Who said I want you in the first place?" "Oh please, the outburst in resus says you do." She let her eyes fall once again before he laughed. "Where is Grace?" "With Anna, I didn't know what to tell her about you... I didn't want to scare her." He nodded with a smile. "Thank you, I know it can't be hidden from her but I'd like to keep her out of this as much as I can." "I understand... Does this mean you'll give over and let me take care of you now?" "Ha. No chance Beauchamp, no chance."

Connie got comfortable as they continued chatting for the next few hours. Of every scenario she had pictured, this had never been one. She was sure Sam would be angry, hate her even for not telling him the truth. Yet they were sitting here, talking like nothing had changed but in his mind it hadn't. For the last few months, he'd seen Grace as his daughter and knowing that she really was, just cemented everything for him. He would be here to stay whether Connie wanted it or not.