Cheap Thrills

My Life

Toni-
I sit quietly at the dining room table watching as Ken's family talk and laugh over the food that Ms. Edmonds had prepared. I feel my stomach clench at the smell of garlic, rosemary, lemon, and a few more spices mixed in with the delicious looking meal. Mostly every food on this table has something I'm allergic to and just looking at it makes me feel like dying. God help me.

"Are you enjoying your food Toni?" Ms. Edmonds ask from the head of the table causing everyone to turn towards me. I look down at my barely touched plate and back up to her questioning eyes "yes ma'am" I tell her lying.

"Are you sure because you barely touched your food and I made it especially for you" she says making me feel even more quilty about not eating the delicious but deadly food. "I'm sorry I'm ju...excuse me please" I say before leaving from the table and to my room.

I shut my door and lock it. Getting down on my knees I pull a small black bag from under the bed and dump it's contents onto my nicely made up bed. "Dammit" I say in frustration looking at the filled Epipens. My mind goes back to when Wayne would torture me for not doing a job right and force feed me foods I was allergic to. I went to the hospital over a dozen times before one day I stuck the Epipen in me before the torture. It worked to lessen the feel of my throat slowly closing and cutting off my air supply.

I take the cap off the Epipen and place it on the bed before pulling my jeans down to reveal my thigh. "How far you've come" I say sarcastically to myself before driving the needle into my thigh. "Fu-" I start to scream out before muffling my mouth with my hand. After sitting there for a minute I pull the needle out and pull up my pants.

I start to put away the Epipens before a knock on the interrupts me. I quickly push the bag under the bed before going to open the door to see Denise standing there "hey." She smiles at me before speaking "hey I wanted to come up here and make sure you was okay" she says.

I nod walking out of the room with her following me and I quietly open Skai's door to see her still asleep "I'm fine, just tired" I tell her shutting the door and walking back down the hall way with her following after me. "You good for them" she says causing me to pause my walking and turn towards her. "Excuse me?" I ask. "The kids and Kenny, your good for them" she says again smiling down at me. I look at her with a small smile on my face "thank y-" "oh my God your bleeding!" She exclaims pointing down to my leg.

I look down to see blood staining my jeans exactly where I just stuck the needle through my thigh. "Fuck" I whisper out. "Ken-" she start to yell out before I place my hands over her mouth shushing her "shh shh you can't tell him" I tell her. She peers at me before pulling me into the bathroom beside the guest room.

"What the hell is going on? Why are you bleeding?" She asks me locking the door. I sigh before talking, might as well trust someone "I have hemophilia, my blood doesn't clot like normal so I bleed easily even from a tiny stratch" I tell her causing her to gasp.

"So your bleeding out right now!" She asks loudly causing me to shush her again "no! No, I just have to stop the bleeding, I've seen daughters doing it" I say pulling down my pants to look at the blood flow slowing down but the blood has gotten down my leg and is slowly dripping on the floor and staining my white shoes. "Just because you've seen the doctor do it don't mean that you can do it" she says taking a first aid kit out of the cabinet.

"Trust me on this okay, just hand me a cotton swab, some alcohol, and a band aid, and can you go and get me a different pair of pants, and take these shoes into my room I have to clean them?" I ask her. She does what I ask and leaves out the bathroom with my pants and shoes.

I take a rag and wet it before running it down my leg to get the blood off of my leg. After getting the blood off of me I pour some alcohol on the cotton swab and wipe it on the small point that ruined a good pair of shoes and a even better pair of pants. "Okay I got you a new pair of pants, did it stop bleeding?" Denise asks walking into the bathroom. "Yeah" I say putting on the band aid. "Okay here put these on, we have to hurry I'm sure they will be sending a search team out for us soon" she says causing me to chuckle.

"Yeah, thank you for helping me" I tell her putting on the dark denim jeans she brought me. "No problem but you need to tell Kenny about this" she says making me groan. "I will tell him soon" I tell her about to walk out but she stops me. "How did you start bleeding?" She asks.

I turn back around to face her trying to think of a lie but deciding to just tell her the truth. "I'm allergic to what your mom cooked, well not what she cooked but most of the spices she used and I didn't want to be rude by not eating it so I came up here and gave myself a allergy shot with one of my Epipens, but I guess I stuck it in too far or something so it started bleeding" I tell her with my head facing the ground. "Toni that's not safe you should have just told us about your allergies" she tells me causing me to sigh out loud. "I know that already, I just...wanted to impress everyone" I tell her embarrassed.

"Girl there is no need to impress us, you are wonderful and everyone thinks so, how about you tell me what you are allergic to and I will tell my mom to use a different spice or I can set you aside something" she suggests. I small smile crosses my face as I look up at her "you would do that?" I ask. She throws her arm over my shoulder and leads me out of the bathroom "of course I would we are future sister in laws aren't we?" She asks causing me to chock on air "very funny Denise" I say sarcastically.

"Well you need a little laughter, the whole family is coming over tomorrow" she says making me gulp. "Lord help me" I mutter as we walk into the dining room. Everyone turns towards us two making a blush immediately spread across my face.

"Bout time you two showed we was about to send out a SWAT team to come and look for y'all" Ms. Edmonds say causing everyone to laugh except me who stands there nervously chuckling. "Sorry momma we just lost track of time" Denise says covering for us. "Well y'all food got cold so I put it in the fridge for y'all, and we started on desert my famous chocolate marble cake so sit down and eat up" Ms. Edmonds say pointing towards our seats.

I silently thank God because I don't have to eat the food but I just stuck the needle in my thigh for nothing. My life...