Bound By Purpose

Hope is a Distance Unreached.

I keep myself breathing in and out. I make myself stay calm as Howard and some of his assistants scurry around the room readying for my trial run. I sit at a distance running over things in my head. Howard comes over to join me.

"Ya ready pal?"

"Yeah." I hop down from my perch with shaking legs. Howard catches me by the arm and lays his hand on my shoulder. 

"You sure? Because you're shaking."

"Alright I'm nervous..." I glance up to make eye contact. "But I've come too far not to trust you."

He pats me on the back pushing me forward. "Glad you have so much faith in me." He tries to pull me forward but the aura of the capsule and the things being wheeled around has stopped me to think again. He turns back to me and I see the hint of  regret in him. He brushes a stray piece of hair behind my ear. "It's going to be fine. I've personally gone through every outcome, every path to success or failure in this. We won't fail." In a very forward gesture he lets his hand glance across my face and then drops down to my hand where he laces his fingers in mine. "I won't let anything happen." I nod believing him. His reassurance doesn't take away much of my nervousness but the way he leads me away gently with his hand in mine has taken my mind off what's ahead. 

In the corner of the room is a table, much like the one Steve laid on in the beginning, in fact it may be the same one. As I get closer I know it not to be true, the doors are clear and there isn't as many trinkets on the edges. I let out another breath and look down beside me where Howard's hand is no longer in mine. A women is beside me now taking my jacket. I pull away.

"Evelyn, meet Maria. She's a nurse of mine, she's brilliant and I know she'll take care of you." Howard says while he busies himself with tools. I let the woman take my jacket, revealing my wrap underneath. I see a hint of a smile from Maria as she takes it away. Howard turns back to me and takes my side. He offers a hand and helps me up onto the table. I lay back with my eyes close as I freeze when my skin touches the cold metal.

"Okay Evelyn we're gonna start now. I need you to keep your breathing even as start to put the serum in you." I open my eyes to Howard and several masked doctors over me. I reach out for one more act of reassurance and I receive it from Howard. He grabs my hand and squeezes it tightly. He leans over and ever so lightly kisses me on my forehead. He leans back still keeping eye contact. He nods and before anything else can happen he lets go and disappears from sight. My hand is pressed palms down against the metal and sears from the transfer from the heat of Howard's hand to the cold of the table.  I do as he says and focus on my breathing as the doctors move machines over me and prick me with little needles all along my arms and legs. I've learned not to ask any questions besides i'm preoccupied with the pain. They drugged me up good earlier but they are putting holes into my body and pumping things in. 

I wait for it be over by focusing on the good times. I try to picture myself as an 11 year old girl. Always following on the heels of a younger Bucky. I feel myself smile. Such a young and naive girl at the time. I grew up with with everything and even now I still have my parents. My poor sweet parents... My innocent mother and my hardened father. The war destroyed them.

I feel the needles retract and they ask me to open my eyes. A masked woman who could be Maria speaks. "It's time Ms. Moore. We've successfully transferred the serum into you. We are going to let the table stand and then we'll close the doors. You will experience a quick blast of cool air. The gas will render you unconscious almost immediately, and your brain activity will be reduced to a minimum. We will hold you in this position for as long as we can. Someone will be watching every second of the day until we feel it necessary to wake you." I give a slight nod to numb and foggy to answer. The nurse speaking turns away and then the table's doors close on me. It's become a coffin. I feel trapped even as it levitates itself up. 

I'm standing now. Looking out at the people I find Howard and give him a nod. He points beyond my line of sight. The fear finally hits as the blast of cold air consumes me. I breathe in...