Secret Love Story (narry) (boyxboy)

Chapter 12

The day that is after tomorrow- Thursday- came way too soon for Niall's liking. Liam and Louis came for a' visit' and where leaving the next day with Harry. At the moment they were at some grungy bar in downtown Dublin, listening to bad Karaoke and a kick-ass band.

Niall grasped the neck of his beer bottle with a firm hand. He put it up against the light and slowly let his finger off the slender neck until just his index finger and thump was holding up the condensing green bottle. The dim light of the grungy Dublin bar passed through the glass. It succumbed to the laws of gravity, immediately bending when they entered the different plain. He could feel the green reflected light dancing into his eyes, making his pupils contract. He could feel the warm air of the bar make his pale skin flush from the warmth.

He was so hyper aware of what was going on around him; Louis and Liam bellowing out carefree laughs, finding humor at Harry's expense. He felt the deep rumble of Harry's voice as he let out a muffled inventive, cursing his easily recognizable mop of curly hair and dimples. He could hear the excitement in the voices of the people in the bar, urging Harry to serenade them with at least one song; sorrows are better swallowed if chased down with a beautiful voice.

He felt Harry shuffle beside him, felt his piercing eyes look at him for a split second but he never lifted his eyes from the bottle of beer. Since the day before, Niall hadn't been able to smile. There was a sick feeling at the pit of his stomach, like he had eaten bad food but he knew it wasn't food poisoning, because he hasn't been able to eat either.

Niall guessed Harry decided to humor the crowd, because a jovial cheer went around the place when Niall felt the air beside him stir indicating Harry had stood up. He watched as the tall boy's strides eat up the ground, making his way to the low stage where a mike and a bar stool waited for him. The band that was beside the small stage prepped their instruments eagerly; one could practically smell their anticipation. The same anticipation he always felt before he went on stage for a show.

"Hi M'Harry", Harry spoke slowly into the mike, his words ending in a low deep tone from his accent, the end syllable of his name drawled out in the fashion that was distinct to him.

The crowd broke out in amused chuckles; they all knew who he was. Harry smiled realizing his mistake, but it didn't reach his eyes like it normally would. Niall noticed that his hair was more unruly than normal and his green eyes were not sparkling like they usually did.

He looked bone tired; the picture of a man who had his heart broken.

Niall felt his heart constrict. He never wanted to hurt Harry. He always thought he was the only one good at making Harry smile that special smile when he was down. And he took delight in it too, because he loved seeing Harry happy. He had the face that was meant to look happy all the time. He should always have a smile etched on his face and the glow of inner contentment pasted on his skin, because in the moments like those, when Niall sees Harry looking that beautiful from happiness that he was able to give him, he feels like he has done the world the greatest favor. But now Harry was on stage, looking the saddest he has ever seen him and Niall felt like complete and utter shite.

The pianist gave a sweet melancholy note that pierced the air in the bar. The guitarists responded with a deep bass that was supplemented by the clang of the drums. The band tuned their instruments to the key of the song that Harry was preparing to sing. Harry's deep baritone rumbled as he cleared his throat, getting ready to sing his heart out.

"I have always loved this song. It really speaks to me, now more than ever." Was the only clue he gave to the people in the bar that he was about to sing.

Harry opened his mouth, his pinks lips made to look darker because of the spotlight was focused on him. He let out that first note of that song, furrowing his brow in concentration. His voice cracked as the crescendo went high a little bit, but his melodious deep voice made it work.

His chest rose with slow shallow breathes as he poured his feelings into the song, and Niall knew.

He knew that the song was directed to him. Harry didn't look at him to make him think that, but the two had always been able to know without word what the other was feeling.

Right now Harry was broken hearted ... hurt ... disappointed ... and nostalgic.

And it was all because of Niall.

Niall felt the worlds of the song slither out of Harry's mouth, and like the snakes that they were, bit hard into Niall's heart. He could feel the pain of the poison, pumping into his heart with each word that Harry breathed into the microphone.

Niall put down his beer feeling the power in his fingers leave him. He wanted to tell Harry to stop, because he was already feeling dead inside and now it was making him worse. How could one feel worse than dead? But he couldn't find his voice, it was like Harry had robbed him of all his bodily functions, forced him to listen to the torture that he was going through, because of what he said to him. Harry was streaming his hurt straight into Niall, making him unaware of nothing but that.

Harry's voice surrounded Niall in a soft warm cocoon. It flooded his ears, blinded his eyes. Niall felt warm, but Harry voice was like ice trying to chill him to the bones. He felt the pain in his heart; transferring and flowing all over his body as Harry punctured into that chorus, letting everyone and him, especially him, know that he agreed with those words he was singing.

He had never heard Harry sing like that, sing like he was inside the song, like he was commanding the song. His voice low and rough, barely hitting those high notes he was known for. Gruffness mixed with emotions made Niall feel like he was floating in a dam of his own guilt, shame and longing.

He let the emotion swim through him, listened to Harry for what felt like years. His heart was bleeding and he knew that Harry's was too.

All this while his was head down, barely able to lift it, but as the song came to an end he finally looked up to the stage. Harry had his eyes closed singing like there was no tomorrow and as he whispered that last note, his eyes slowly opened meeting Niall's.

Niall felt a hot tear escape his moist eye. He fought the feeling that Harry had choked down his throat, letting his strangled voice find freedom.

"Harry." Niall whispered.

He closed his eyes, letting light dance on his purplish eyelids.

"Harry, I didn't mean to hurt you." He said a little louder, but it was too late. For by that time, the mop of brunet hair was disappearing through the airports door that led to the airport lounge.

Leaving Niall behind with the imprint of Harry's hand, wiping his tear away.

And the lingering of his voice, whispering "Niall."