Calling Dr.Smiles

Ⅳ.Ⅵ

→"So, I was going to pick up some chips, and oh I'm dead inside. What kind do you want?"

☎SUNDAY 10:03

I was always down one parent when he left. Mom picked up both of the parts of mom and dad, and it was hard. There were somethings that she knew, and she didn't. Like how Kurt gets fussy if he hasn't been left alone for a little while. Or If Iris has almonds, she feels like she's gonna throw up.

I don't know why I'm getting into this. It doesn't matter anymore, I have to just get out of this house. If I don't the memories will just keep on coming, and coming. The bed was still when I left it, Kurt must be downstairs. I take a glance of myself in the mirror, I look like- death.

How many death jokes have I made, in front of her while she was just keeping this all bottled inside? I didn't even mean to- forget it. We all know now.

I traveled down stairs and saw that Iris and Kurt were downstairs with mom, eating breakfast in silence. If she didn't tell them, they defienelty heard the conversation last night. A second later, I saw Carina and Sonia come from the kitchen with plates in their hands. Maybe things wouldn't get worse than this.

"I'm gonna step out, I'll be back." I announced to them and they all just nodded their heads. I took that as my cure to go, and pulled a coat over my sleepwear and walked past the porch. I could go to Pacer's house, but then he'll ask about what happened. And then I'd have to say it.

I could go to Dippy's house, I turned to my left and saw that her light was off. Why bother her with this? Seems like I can't talk to anyone about this. Not yet.

My feet venture past Dippy's house, to the local CVS. I didn't have any cash on me, or even my keys. But being anywhere is better than thinking about - that. And I left my phone, so I can't even call Nissi. Into CVS we go.

The automatic doors opened and I walked though the food section slowly. If only I had brought my wallet. I kept on walking, watching the sea salt chips and the sour cream chips slide by, and stopped before heading into the snack section. 

I touched everything I saw, the Kit Kats and and the sour patch kids. And my finger lingered on everything, until the aisle ended and I felt something else brush my fingers. I retracted my hand as fast as you could do without hurting yourself, and looked to see what I touched. 

Pacer.

"Anna, wh- actually I expect this from you. So, what's going on?" He smiled, and I saw the chips in his little handheld cart, along with some aftershave and a comb. I shook my head at him, "nothing, just buying some things."

"It's Sunday, and ten in the morning. You don't have a car, so that meant you walked here. You only walk to get away from things. Tell me." He- how could he know? I mean, what gave it away? And so fast?

"It'd be better if we went to your place, so I can explain it all."

☎ 11:00

"So how are you doing?" He asked quietly, like I was a child or something. I wasn't, I was nineteen. I was supposed to be able to handle things like this, like adults do. But I didn't currently, feel like an adult. "I'm not sure, I just found out that my dad is- definitely not coming home."

"Do you- wanna keep talking about this? Or you wanna talk about something else?" I nod my head at him and he smiles before getting up from the couch abruptly and disappearing for a few minutes.

I really though he left the house, until he came back with a box labeled, 'Pacer'. "Anna Dillard, I'm proud to present to you, memories from elementary school." He gushed like some sort of kid who was showing off something in show and tell, it was kind of cute. 

He set the box down, and I sat up to look inside of it. It was filled with letters and photos, and weird things boys collect during that age. Like rocks, legitimately can you tell me why people collect such things? "You collected rocks?"

"I was going to become a boy-scout, I wanted to be interested in something, they were my friends, choose any of those excuses." He giggled, fishing through the box  with his hands until he finally stopped on something. He took out whatever it was, slowly.

It was a letter?

"Here is a letter, I wrote to a special girl in the fifth grade. Very touchy feely- not enough grammar in the world to help me though." He said and just as he was reading it I snatched it out of his hands. 

It was light pink, and his handwriting- was adorable. Heart stickers were decorating the corners and his words did need some help. "Dear Valentine,- aw so cute," I touched my hand to my heart and went on. "I like you smile, and I like you laugh. You smell like you always take a bath. Bof- his spelling, not mine- of us should get marriage."

"Fun fact, I used to say marriage like it was a disease." His cheeks turned a slight red as he bobbed his head back. I can honestly say this was the cutest thing ever- but who was it for? I hope he got the chance to tell this girl his feelings. "Did you ever get to tell the girl, that you liked her?"

He looked like he was fighting back a smile when I asked him, and he shook his head. "I didn't tell her then, but I'll tell her now." He said slyly, and then it hit me. It was me. I smiled at this, and placed the latter back into the box, and took a seat next to him.

"I do take baths by the way."