"You were my cure and I was your disease. You were saving me but I was killing you."
—Anonymous
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Tiningnan ko yung relo ko.
2:35 PM.
Dalawampu’t limang minuto na lang. Para sa ibang tao, sobrang tagal ng 25 minutes para maghintay. Pero ako, 25 minutes na lang ang natitira sa ‘kin. Pagkatapos no’n, mamamatay na ulit ako.
Nandoon lang ako sa katapat na kanto, nagtatago sa may likod ng puno; nagdadalawang-isip kung papasok ba ako o hindi. Kung tutuusin, pwede naman akong umupo sa loob. Pero ewan ko ba kung anong katangahan ‘tong pumasok sa kukote ko at napili kong tumayo sa labas.
Isang patak ng tubig ang dumampi sa pisngi ko. Pinahid ko iyon at napatingin sa langit. Maliwanag ang sikat ng araw, pero nagsisimula na ring kumulimlim. Unti-unti, natatakpan ng ulap ang bughaw na langit.
Naglakad ako patungo sa sasakyan ko na nakaparada sa tabi ng puno. Pumasok ako sa driver’s seat at umupo sabay sandal sa headrest. Yung picture ni Angelica, nandoon sa salamin, nakadikit. Ang ganda ng ngiti niya sa litrato. Para bang sinasabi nitong, “25 minutes na lang. And I owe it all to you.”
Si Angie, siya lang tanging babaeng minahal ko sa buong buhay ko. But it was too late when I realized that I did.
Nakilala ko siya noong fourth year College. Freshman pa lang siya no’n. Just like anyone else, we were strangers to begin with. Nakatambay lang ako noon sa corridor. It was the first day of class. Maraming mga freshman ang nagkandaligaw-ligaw kakahanap sa mga classroom nila. Ako naman, nakatambay lang sa labas ng classroom ko para obserbahan sila. At inaamin ko, kasama roon ang paghahanap ng mga babaeng pwedeng magpa-excite sa buhay ko.
Lumapit siya sa ‘kin, tinatanong kung saan daw ba makikita yung room niya. Alas siyete y media na ng umaga noon. Pinagpapawisan na rin siya sa kaba dahil 7:00 AM ang simula ng klase niya. When I first saw her, she was obviously naïve. Para siyang tupang naligaw sa gubat; hindi alam kung anong gagawin para makalabas.
Because I had thirty more minutes to spare before my professor turned up, I offered to go with her. Pumayag naman siya. Habang naglalakad kami papunta sa room niya, dinaldal ko siya. I asked her what course she took up, why she chose our school, so on and so forth. To cut the long story short, nilandi ko siya.
Nang makarating kami sa classroom niya, she was fortunate enough that her professor still didn’t arrive. At least, kahit late siya, hindi siya bad shot sa unang araw ng pasukan. Before I let her go, I asked for her name and her number, reminding her to contact me whenever she needed help, or if there’s she had problems with regarding our school. But of course, that was also a part of my scheme. She thanked me and we parted ways.
After three days, she texted me saying she was so grateful and that she was sorry for causing me trouble. She also asked for my name dahil nakalimutan daw niyang itanong sa sobrang pagmamadali at kaba. And that’s when it all started.
Since then, I started flirting with her. I started giving her hints that I liked her. Marami siyang narinig tungkol sa ‘kin, rumours that were actually true. Pero hindi siya naniwala. Instead, she shrugged those off and chose to believe my pretend kindness. She believed all of it so easily. Maybe she was just plain gullible. Maybe I perfected the craft of faking my feelings. I didn’t know and I didn’t care. What mattered was she fell for my lies.
Not to be conceited, but I was one of the popular ones in our university. I was used to the attention, the love calls I was getting. I didn’t ask for it, they willingly offered it to me. And I gladly accepted every single one of it. And truthfully, I enjoyed the perks of being glorified.
