Lauren
It was a new year. Lately, Ally has been spending time more with Sydney and Tori, which is fine because I've been figuring out things with Lucy. I like Lucy and Ally, but my mind is everywhere between them. Lucy and I have been friends since we were little and with Ally 4 years. She and I have gone through more things together because of the group and as friends. She's been debating of who she was, and sometimes, I feel like she likes me in a way I see her but she also likes Sydney.
Lucy and I have more history. We dated for 3 months before and then she liked someone else so we broke up before I became the Lauren Jauregui. Ally and I had a talk where I told her first about my sexuality and she was so proud and happy for me, and then she closed the door and sat on my lap and the next minute she was kissing me. At that moment, I had a thing for her. But because of Lucy being in my life again, I notice when she's mad or jealous at me. On the new year she was at Disneyland with Sydney and Tori and I was Colorado with Lucy.
I shouldn't be deciding who I love or who I want to spend my life with. Weighing all my feelings and knowing who I want to be with. I know in my heart that I will always love Lucy, but as always my best friend and nothing more. Being with Ally, I know I feel more nervous as exciting and my heart beats faster whenever I'm next or around her.
Luce 😎 ( 9:12 am ) Lucy, I'm super sorry, it's late but can we talk? Call me! x
Incoming call, Luce 😎
"Hey babe, what's wrong?'
"Hey, so I know I would never want to do this over the phone but-"
"You're breaking up with me for her? What the hell, Lauren, after what we've been through? Second chances are there for a god damn reason! Don't call me ever again!
"Lucy, I'm so sorry."
"Screw you, Jauregui!'
Well, that went well. I decided to call Mani, to see if she was home with Ally. Sometimes when we have a break, she spends time with her family.
"Maniiii, is Ally with you?
"Yeah actually she is, why?
"I'm going to surprise her. She's not with Sydney right?"
"No, she told her that she wanted to stay friends with her, and plus I heard Sydney likes some other girl."
"Ah, okay I'm heading to the airport now, do you mind telling her you gotta meet someone at the airport?
"Okay but I don't have to lie, because Dinah was actually coming to visit us so this is perfect."
"Oh really? I gotta go, but don't tell her I'm coming okay?
"Okay, love you Have a safe trip!"
"Love you too Mani! Thanks!"
After that call. I went to get her roses and headed to the airport. Luckily there was a flight heading to San Antonio in 2 hours. As I was waiting to board, I was debating to apologize to Lucy because I know I hurt her and I don't want loose her as my friend. She helped me get through a lot of major decisions and I know she was mad at me but she's still a big part of my life.
"Boarding to San Antonio is now ready."
Luce 😎 (12:16 pm) Look, I'm truly sorry about this morning. I don't want to loose you as my friend. You and I been through so much together. I'm not ready to through our friendship away. I'll give you space but please take this as a consideration.
From Luce 😎 (12:18 pm) I don't want to loose you as my friend either but just give me some space.
Luce 😎 (12:19 pm) Of course. Just text me when are in a good place. Thank you.
I turned off my phone after that and look through the window. I was feeling happy about Lucy and I but nervous but ready for my new life with Ally. I just hope she is.
I saw her. She and I smiled at each other after hugging Dinah and Normani. It was just the 4 of us now. We all followed Normani as she was getting her car, I walked slowly behind Ally. She was smiling her roses and I was admiring her.
She stopped for me to catch up with her. She slipped her hand to hold mine. My heart was beating so hard. I don't know if she could hear it but I was finally happy.
:)
So yeah I know it's been a long time I updated... I'm working on new ideas.... if anyone has anything let me know! ☺
