Need Your Love

Chapter 35

*Continued*

La POV

"You lost your virginity at 13?!" the councilor asked wide eyed.

"Yuup to a 16 year old." I smirked.

"So about the age of 11-13 was the ages you started experiencing anger problems?" he wrote down on his notepad and looked back at me.

"Yeah, I told my mom and she just said I was Bi-polar. So she didn't do anything about it until I put someone in a coma when I was 16." I smiled remembering that day.

"You put someone in a coma!? How and why?" he seemed so fascinated about my life. Nigga knock it off.

"Yeah, well he did something I didn't like so I grabbed him by the neck and slammed his head on the desk. He fell down and I just laughed." I was a bad ass kid now that I think about it.

"Wow, well did this type of behavioral issues get worse since you were 18?" he asked.

"Yuup, I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. I only care about 6 people. My girl,my dad, my little brother,my mom and my BestFriends Karmell and Q." I smiled.

"Would you consider you're self an aggressive being?" He asked. I have yet to figure out this niggas name.

"Hell yeah, I love fighting." I laughed

"Are you aware of how many fights you've been in?"

"Yuup, I keep a count. I can honestly say I got in 46 fights. I've won 45. The one I lost was with my dad. Wooh, never again." he shook his head and slightly laughed.

"Wow. If you don't mind my asking what is your girlfriends name?" he folded his arms and I sighed.

"Camrie, and were no longer together but she still means everything to me." I said in a low tone.

"Well I'm sorry, would this be part of the depression and anger along with your mothers death. I understand things got a lot harder on you once she was gone from what you tell me." He asked

"No, no, no. Don't blame it on them! It's all me, I'm the one that caused this."

"I'm not blaming them La'Vincent and it's not you, you have no control over these emotions. Now please open up to me. I'm here to help you. As I can see your a closed person because we've been here for several hours and I've only found out your a fighter,conceited and sexually active. So can you tell me what's really going on? Im sure I can help if you let me." I took a deep sigh and closed my eyes.

"Alright,alright,alright. Yeah it got much worse when my mom died. It's my fault she's gone. If I would have never got caught smoking weed she wouldn't have had to take a ride away from me. That ride was her last and we ended on bad terms. I didn't even get to say goodbye, her lasts words to me was that she was ashamed I turned out that way and was sick of me. I told her fuck you and went to my room. I fell asleep and when I woke up I had like 30 missed calls. I called my dad back like 'the fuck is going on?' He told me my mom w-was killed in a accident." I paused.

"And I didn't know how to react. I saw red. I got up and went to the regular hospital we always go to. When I got there I saw my family looking devastated. When I walked up everybody mugged me and was mumbling it was my fault, I barely even talk to my family now. Well I went crazy after her death like nobody said shit to me for like 2 months straight except my BestFriends, Karmell and Q. I went to school though and I had the hardest times in class, I couldn't read,add,subtract nor spell. That was up until I met one of the greatest things that had ever happened to me. Camrie, we met at school one day and since that point on we've been in love but of course my anger issues and stupidity got the best of me after I slacked off my medication and I made some bad decisions. She tried to kill herself one day but it didn't work. Well it did but she woke up. When the doctors told me she had died it was like my mom all over again. When she woke up I felt so relieved. I love that girl with all my heart but I just don't know, how to love.. I try my hardest but my fucking mind gets the best of me. I promised her so many things but I can't keep promises. I need her so much right now. I don't mean to do the shit I do, I just do it. Its not my intentions to hurt her. I love her so much and would do anything to have her back but she hates me, Hell everyone hates me. I hat to admit, I'm one depressed nigga. I can't fucking deal with this! I wanna die! I try so hard to be this perfect nigga that I'm not. I try to please everyone but my mind doesn't function that way. It's like half my brain works! This shit is hard as hell on me and this break up making it worse. I love her so much and I never mean to hurt her! Its not my fault I swear, it's something in me that takes control. If I die it would be easier on everybody right? Nobody would give a fuck cause they don't now. Depression is a sickness and I'm suffering from it-I can't do this. I'm out!" I cried so much tears. I stood up trying to leave but he pulled me back.

"That's all I wanted to know La'Vincent. That's all I needed to know..."

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Cam POV

La'Vincent never has a lock on his phone so he butt dialed me. I was sitting in the hospital with Danae in so many tears. From Riley and La. Just hearing him say all that about himself made me weak. I feel so bad I never really talked to him. I feel like it's my fault.

"Danae, I have to go. Be safe." I kissed her forehead and jogged tout the hospital. I need to make things right.

I was in my car on my way to Vinny's house when I say a group of boys. One of them was getting jumped. I looked harder at the boy on the ground and saw La'Vincent. My first reaction was to save my baby.

I pulled out a gun from under my seat and cocked it. I rolled down my window and shot at every boy being careful not to hit La. Once he saw me he ran into the backseat and I sped off.

"What happened?" I asked him through the rear view mirror.

"I-I don't know." he had been crying a lot and I could tell.

"Were you causing trouble or did they start it?" I asked

"I swear they did. After my meeting I went for a walk and they were messing with me."

"Did you have any products on you?" I stopped at a red light and looked back at him. He nodded and I shook my head. That therapy session did something to him. He could've and would've easily whooped all they asses. He doesn't seem right. The drive was quiet and awkward.

"La, I need to talk to you." I looked in the backseat.

"No, Camrie. I'm fine." he got out and ran into the house. I started my car up and laid my head on the steering wheel crying. I drove back to Riley's house in tears. Danae's car was here and so was Joshua's. I got out and walked into the house. I didn't talk to them I just went up to my room. I laid on the bed and cried my eyes out.

I picked up my phone and starting making a flipagram of me and Riley with some of our pictures because the rest wouldn't fit. I used the song 'Heaven' By Beyoncé for background music and posted it on Instagram with the caption "Oh my god I can't believe your gone. I love you with all my heart RiRi! You were the bestest best friend a girl could have. A part of me is gone and now in heaven🙏. I remember you used to always say you wonder how it felt to fly. Now you can my Angel👼! I know your in a better place now StinkaBug! Please watch down on me and your future god son/daughter when the time comes. I know u wouldn't want me to cry and be strong. I will try baby😪. I Love You Riley💙 @rilocc_ #rip"

I made another video for Facebook with videos of us singing,dancing,and pictures with the same caption. I'm Gonna Miss My StinkaBug.

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