Things I didn't like:
*You change tenses a lot and it can disract the reader from what's actullay happening.
*I suggest getting a editor for your grammer and punctuation. I'm no grammer natzi but, I did spot a few.
*Some of the things you described didn't make much sense. Why was Avena so, calm when James was holding a knife? I mean I would be freaking out and runing for the hills. Just little things like that don't make much sense.
Things I did like:
*You kept the same flow throughout the story. It's easier to stay on track that way.
Overall, I give you 2/5 stars. You need to fix a lot though. Other than that keep writing you have a good plot going there!
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