love is easy

chapter 2 - i'll heal you

harry pov - A few days had passed since i last saw doug. I got a call from the clinic. 'Hello is this Mr Judd?' a quite female voice asked. 'Um yes it is, is everything ok?' i asked anxiously. 'Dougie was making great progress, but unfortunately has began self harming. The specialist are confused what this could be over, but they also know this isn't an easy process.' The woman said in a sweet tone. I felt my heart fall in my chest. Why did he have to go through this pain? He had such a hard life as a child, how is it fair on him? I wish i could have taken all his pain myself. 'Mr Judd, are you still there?' the phone called. 'Gosh, yes, sorry' i said with tears forming in my eyes. 'Is it possible if you can make your way over to the clinic asap?' Said the woman. 'Yes of course. I'll be the in 10 minutes.'

dougie pov - 'i wish he loved me back oh how i wish.' The only thought running through my head whilst making fresh cuts on my arm, my tears rolling into them sending a stinging feeling each time. I didn't want to spiral backwards, but this felt like the only thing making the pain go away. Both my arms dripping with blood, i held my legs tight to my chest and i sobbed, silently. 

harry pov - i ran to dougies room and burst the door open. He had pulled the sleeves of his blink jumper all the way down to cover the cuts and absorb the blood. His eyes, red raw. I slammed the door and ran over to the bed where he was sitting. I rolled up his sleeves, tears rolling down both of our faces. 'I didn't mean it Harry! Please don't hate me, I'm getting better.' he said whilst sobbing. I gently planted kisses along each of his fresh cuts. I looked up at him ' I'm not gong to ask why, but i promise you. It will get better. I love you dougie.' I said it with so much meaning, but of course he will think it is just a friendly way. 

dougie pov - 'I love you too Harry.' I said wishing we both meant it as lovers. I looked into his amazing eyes and started crying, uncontrollably. I couldn't stop. Harry pulled me up into an embrace, while i sobbed onto his chest, he sobbed into my hair giving me soft kisses on top of my head. I don't know why he was crying. Maybe seeing me in such a state? We both fell and lay down on my bed. My head buried in the crook of his neck, stroking my bitten finger nails up and down his chest. Tears still rolling down our faces, but no noises, just silent cries. He pulled me in closer and tangled our legs together. My eyes slowly closed into a light sleep. 

harry pov - I lay there with dougies heavy head on my chest (not that i minded) thinking. Thinking about whether i would ever tell the young boy how i really felt about him. Thinking about whether he will love me back or reject me forever. Thinking about my sexuality. (I had always been open about my sexuality. I'm straight, but if i really love someone then why should i stop loving them because of fear?). After many hours of deep thought, i felt dougie stir. I reached over the boys small body to check the time. It was 3:26am. I didn't want to leave dougie without saying goodbye so i decided to get comfy and be dougies big spoon. Dougie grabbed my arm and pulled it over his body holding onto it for dear life. 'Wow are you okay?' I said with concern it was like dougie thought i was going to walk out and abandon him. 'Yeh i just don't want to be here alone.' His voice choked up and i felt a tear fall onto my arm. 'I'm not going anywhere. I promise.' I said in a genuine tone. He pulled me close to him, feeling the scabs from his cuts press into my arm. Dougie flinched. 'Do they hurt?' i said with concern. 'Yeah' he said like he was admitting defeat. 'Can i try and make them feel better?' i asked. He nodded with a smile on his face and eyes full of tears. I took one of his arms and gently ran my thumb over each cut dougie had made. I took his arm and rested it on my head and began stroking the tears off of his face. I kissed up and down dougies arm, like earlier, this time being more gentle knowing the pain they were causing him.

dougie pov - I lay there watching him soothe my wounded arms. 'What did i do to deserve someone so amazing? Someone who cares about me. Someone who wants the best for me. Someone who loves me.' I thought to myself wishing i had the courage to say it out loud. Once harry had finished kissing my arms. I intertwined our fingers and smiled. He smiled back and pulled my neck so i was closer to him, foreheads resting against each other, lips hovering centimetres apart. He planted a soft kiss on my lips that sent fireworks all around my body. It was nothing more than a peck, but it was amazing. Even if harry did just mean it as friends. Harry closed his eyes and went off into a deep sleep with me staring at him the whole time, too afraid to fall asleep, worrying if harry will realise he kissed me and run off. My breathing became quick like a panic attack, thoughts racing round my head at 1million mph. Harry sat up quickly with a concerned look on his face. My face was full of fear. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me in so tight, our chests were touching, reassuring me he wasn't leaving. My breathing eventually returned to a normal pace, inhaling harry's scent. He ran one hand up and down my back and the other was playing with my hair. 'You're okay, i'm here.' Harry said, his voice muffled, his mouth being in my hair from kissing my head. We lay down together, still holding me. I shut my eyes and dreamed about me and harry, together, in a relationship, doing... things! Even if harry didn't feel the same way. That kiss made my mind wild.