Selfish ~ Trevor Jackson

Religion

Chris sat down somewhat near the vomit and buried his head in his hands. I stared at her blankly. There was nothing else I could say, nothing else I could do. I let out a great sigh and glanced at Chris who had seemed to have started crying.

"Take me home," I said. I didn't care who did, just as long as I did.

"Your car is--" Trevor started.

"Leave it. Take me home," I ordered once more. He swallowed and then took my hand and lead me out the door making sure he was behind me to prevent another attack or threat against that bitche's life.

I couldn't really feel anything anymore. I was out of emotion and out of tears. I was definitely not out of anger, but I couldn't be violent any longer. I needed to get Leanni and make sure she was okay.

I felt like I couldn't trust anybody.

I climbed into the passenger side of Trevor's car and waited for him to pull off. But he lingered the key in front of the ignition. I reiterated my order verbatim and he did as I asked. "But first, we have to get Leanni," I said. He nodded and then made a U-turn.

I was surprised that Trevor was so quiet. He always wanted to talk about things. I guess he was just as devastated as I was. However, there was one thing I wanted to know.

"How did you know where I was?" I asked.

"Kat called me and told me where she thought you might be headed," he answered.

"Oh," I replied. "Why did you stop me?"

"Leanni and I need you. You can't go to jail," he said. I smiled for a second and then frowned once again. "Why haven't you answered my calls?"

"I dunno,"

"I know you're going through a lot right now, but can you just be honest with me for a few minutes?"

"Yeah,"

"So... You haven't answered my calls because?"

"I wanted to fuck you and you rejected me indirectly. I was embarrassed,"

"I didn't have a condom on me,"

"Well fuck, you didn't have to lie,"

"I know, but I was embarrassed that you had even made it apparent that you wanted to have sex,"

"Oh..."

I got out of the car and went up to the door, opening it with the key Katrina gave me. She and Leanni were cuddled up on the couch with buckets of ice cream and a plate of cookies sitting in front of them. The television was still on but Kat's snoring rung through the house.

I circled the couch and gathered Leanni's things before going to wake her up. I tried my best to keep my mind off of the bruises on her body and gently touched her shoulder. She stirred briefly, so I took the extra step of shaking her as gently as possible.

She popped open her eyes and then squinted them trying to adjust to the brightness of the TV. "Mommy," she said softly. Kat sat up and let go of Leanni stretching her body out. "Put this on," I replied handing her coat over.

"What happened?" Kat asked me.

"I'll tell you later... It's a long story," I answered. Lee Lee pulled her sneakers on and then gave Katrina a hug before jumping into my arms.

I thanked Kat for watching her and then left. I put her into her booster seat and listened to her drabble on with Trevor about the fun she had with Auntie Kat. Trevor looked thrilled to see her and hear her voice. I, on the other hand, was still recovering from the evenings events.