What Is Love - Barlow/Williams

Part 33: Feeling Your Frustration

Chapter Summary:

The last chapter, Robbie was left trying to deal with the bruising he had uncovered. This chapter finds him still distraught after the bruising revelation, and even more so when Gary asks if they can 'talk'. Will truth's come out? Is honesty always the best policy?

So sorry this has taken so long! Also beware - this is a very long chapter, and it gets very smutty at the end - you have been warned! xx (See the end of the chapter for author notes.)

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It had been a couple of days since Robbie's disconcerting discovery, and he was still struggling with his own demons about it – leaving things unsaid was not a good idea, in his experience. He still wanted to know how exactly they came into being in the first place, although he had a fair idea, but his imagination was running overtime and he didn't like what it was coming up with. He wanted to have it out with Gary, demand to know what when on between them, but at the same time, his better judgment kept reminding him that it would likely do no good, and in fact, if he wasn't careful, it could put everything he currently had, in jeopardy.

But try as he might, he just couldn't get over it. He wondered how long it had been going on, how much had Gary concealed for him? From everyone?! He continuously berated himself for not doing something sooner, he knew Lucas was trouble; and after speaking to the ex-boyfriend, he should definitely have done something then - he should've got that abusing prick as far away from Gary as possible!

But above all, he wished Lucas hadn't just gotten away with it all, like it appeared he had. He's gone, and that's great, Robbie tried to content himself with, but still there was that niggle at the back of his mind that he couldn't shift; oh, how much he wished he had seen Lucas gotten his comeuppance!

As more days trickled by, and still unable to tear his thoughts away from Lucas' hidden abuse of Gary, he called Mark. He, of course wanted to tell Mark about him and Gary, but he knew he couldn't – not yet, and not without consulting Gary first. But Robbie just couldn't take the secret torment anymore, he wanted justice for his man. But after taking the chance and calling up Mark, he quickly realised how difficult it actually was trying to talk to Mark, without telling Mark they were sleeping together:

Robbie: Mark, what would you do if you knew someone was being hurt, like physically, by someone they were seeing?

Caught completely off-guard by the swift shift in conversation (from football to domestic abuse), Mark took a moment's pause to consider Robbie's question...

Mark: Oh...er....well, I'm not sure, what have they told you exactly? He asked lightly.

Robbie: Well, so far, nothing. but I've seen some bruises and I know they've been trying to cover it up, and act like they're fine, but it's killing me not being able to say anything, or not knowing whether I should do something, even if it means they're going to be mad at me for it!"

Mark slipped into silent reflection on the other end of the phone. But after only a moment, he slowly began to speak again, slowly as if he was choosing his words...very carefully:

Mark: Rob, is this about Gary, by any chance? Do you think Lucas is hurting him?

Robbie froze. Stunned into silence; flabbergasted at how quickly Mark had worked it out. Had he been too obvious?! He didn't think he had. He'd even pre-written out the words he was going to use, before picking up the phone. He immediately scanned his hastily scribbled 'script', to confirm the subject of his inquiry wasn't too blatant. Satisfied he hadn't, he could only conclude Mark was a witch.