Me Him and his Boyfriend

17. Nialls party

"Next Saturday is a party in Nialls house!"

Harry didn't seemed as he wanted to tell me that. I looked down from him and stirred the tea cup.

"And you telling me that now?"

He smiled a little bit and looked up at me.

"Yes?" he whispered hoarsely. "I mean, now as you know a little more, I thought maybe you would say no? I told Niall that I don't..."

I was slightly irritated.

"So you don't want me to go there with you?"

Harry blushed a little bit.

"Yeah, but I thought that because, you know, and all this with Niall, maybe we should stay here or at my house?"

I felt strong. I knew that Niall wasn't anything for me or for  Harry and Harry was mine.

"Let's go over there!" I replied confidently. "It can be fun and I can defend us, me and you."

Harry hesitated. We sat in the kitchen eating breakfast and I realized one thing, maybe he should have told me this earlier.

"Kim, I just want to...."

I snorted.

"Come on, Harry. If he must get over all that as you had, you have to show him who you want and you want me."

He nodded, still a little uncertain.

"Okay, sweetheart, we go there, then?"

♥

I felt some uncertainty about going to Nialls party. It was as if I landed on the edge of what I could handle. Niall was Harry's friend, and I knew that I never wanted to go between them, yet I felt a lot of uncertainty. Niall had once had sex with Harry, only that truth made me sink. I saw before me how they was against each other, on a toilet and I had difficult times to remove those images from my mind. It was as if Niall became my nightmare, but I knew I shouldn't feel in that way. I should instead look at Niall as I looked at Liam and Louis, but still Niall was as a collection demands in the mail.

I chose to buy new clothes. I wanted everything to be new and this time I didn't saved my money. New underwear, a new dress, new shoes, new jacket, new handbag and I even bought new makeup. It was as if everything took time to plan. I took home everything as I could use for my hair and my goal was to become that girl as was perfect. I wanted to at least show Niall that I was his unwanted nightmare. I wanted to show that I still had the power, and Harry would see immediately that it was me he wanted, without a doubts and without reflection.

♥

I stood in front the mirror. I saw everything I had spent on myself and I felt like I was ready for the red carpet. My hair was up with the help of buckles and lots of hairspray. I looked as if I was ready to meet the queen, yet it was only about one small party. I smiled a little bit and I felt like I was a part of Harry's life. He would pick me up in his car and we would go to Nialls idiotic party together. My plan was to prove that I was the one, I wasn't a loser. I was someone who really knew what she wanted and that I would keep it (Harry) forever and ever and ever.

Harry rang the doorbell as usual. I opened the door and noticed he was wearing a white shirt, tight black pants and he was as beautiful as always. The only thing that was difference was that he seemed unhappy.

"What did happened?" I got therefore puzzled out. Harry gulped and he came up with a faint smile.

"Are we really going over there?"